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My Experience with Gentle Parenting

The Things They Don't Tell You About it

By M.N. NegusPublished 11 months ago 3 min read
2
The author and her son

We are living in a world where shaping the minds of our youth has become more important than ever. This task can be daunting, for parents. Questions may arise: how do I make sure my child has everything they need to be successful? What can I do to make them more aware of their actions? How can I express displeasure or concern without using negative words or violence?

it's me, but I know I've had my fair share of questions and doubts when it comes to raising my son. Whenever I'd express concerns to my family and friends, the answers varied. Some would remind me of strict discipline while others reminded me to be compassionate. Research over the internet brought me to a parenting style that would become controversial in my family: gentle parenting.

Gentle parenting is a parenting style that allows parents to model important qualities like independence and compassion, and teach their children them, too. It involves setting boundaries and teaching children about expressing their emotions. It also eliminates the use negative phrases. For example, instead of saying, "No shouting inside the house!" you could say, "Let's use our inside voices, please."

Upon further research, I came to the conclusion that this would be my parenting style. The concept was phenomenal, and there were any drawbacks. Logically, it made the most sense. If you want your child to behave a certain way, you have to show them and teach them through your own actions and words. I could raise my son to be a confident yet compassionate individual.

I'm not sure what I pictured when I decided to take on this style of parenting. Perhaps I thought that my son would become a little angel after teaching him about kindness and being nice to others. I thought it would be easy and efficient. But, my son is almost four years old, and even while I lean towards this way of parenting, he manages to challenge my patience. Despite the talks we've had, hitting others is still a problem for him.

With this style of parenting, it's easy to forget that children aren't machines you can program to act a certain way. Children have minds of their own, unique minds at that, and each child has a different thought process based on their age, gender, etc. Parents have to make sure that the behaviors they are displaying are behaviors that children should pick up, not bad habits or qualities. You have to constantly remind and reinforce positive behavior on a basis. It can be frustrating at times, because no one likes to repeat themselves. Patience is key if you intend to take on this parenting style. It's easy to break the model and lash out whenever you get frustrated with child. It's up to you to be patient but firm. can be a rough line to walk whenever the doubt starts sinking in. Am I being too lenient? Am I being too harsh? Where is the line drawn between the two?

I'm not saying that gentle parenting is bad. In the long run, I believe this parenting style is great! There's not enough articles out there that explain how frustrating it can be for some parents. No one tells you how mindful you need to be of your own actions. No one tells you about the tantrums or meltdowns that can happen despite your parenting. one tells you about the self-doubt that manifests when techniques don't work with your child.

Despite how frustrating at times, I don't regret taking on this parenting style. a slow progress, but progress. I see my son expressing and identifying his emotions. I see him asking for permission to touch and setting his own boundaries. see how happy he is. For better or for worse, I'll continue down this road with him (and with any future children I may have). It's hard, and sometimes, you'll want to scream, but I'm confident it will pay off. It already is. My son is happy, and that's all that matters to me.

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About the Creator

M.N. Negus

M.N is a mother, cosplayer, nerd, and writer for CBR. She loves Marvel Comics and creating fiction. She hopes to inspire others with her stories and success.

Check out her work on CBR!

https://www.cbr.com/author/megan-negus/

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