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Mother or Monster-in-Law

Sure, you liked her... then you married her son.

By Amanda J MollettPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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Wife or mother in-law... who will win?

I married my husband almost one year ago, I at one point in time thought that I'd be getting a great mother in law. I thought that my marriage was going to be better than others because I wasn't going to have this evil mother in law who I hated, or one that hated me just for taking their son. Boy was I wrong. It started before we even got married. His mother and grandmother even tried to make sure we didn't get married.

My mom died 15 years ago and I have nothing to do with my dad, so unfortunately for my husband, he gets off. He wants to have a relationship with my parents but he doesn't. I on the other hand could, but don't, by her choice. His father passed away 3 years ago and his mom doesn't want to have a relationship. He has tried to get his family, especially his mother, to be there for me for him while he's not home. He has tried for me to be included in things, but it never works. I have pretty much given up. There won't be any comment of how she's happy her son met me. No thank you for making my son happy. No thank you for standing by my son all these years. For him there won't be as well, since my mom is gone. So much has been taken from us. So many things that other couples have that we could only dream of.

Although I don't say it out loud to him, I wish that his mother would say, "My son has been so happy since he's met you." Or, "He couldn't have picked anyone better to stand by him." Or, "Don't give up on him." I will never hear these words from her. I will never be respected or treated like I am his wife or that his step kids are his kids. Still, I try for my husband no matter the grief it causes me.

She will not allow me to go on visits with her to see my husband. I told her NOT to wear white to our wedding, like the movie Monster In-Law; she did wear white and I saw it as an insult. How can you not? That is saying she's not right for you, I don't accept this marriage, I don't support this marriage. While we were waiting to start she had made comments about him standing me up. This is not a normal mother-in-law, this is what you call a monster-in-law.

She is one of those mothers that tries to keep the son so close, not wanting him to grow up, but instead be Mommy's little boy forever. Some mothers need to cut the apron strings and this is my mother-in-law to a tee.

Mother-in-law, if you pay enough attention, also spells woman Hitler. Enough said! Seems pretty clear to me that there is a reason why it is spelled this way. I wish that my first thought would have been right and we could be one big happy family, but I don't ever see that happening. I wish it could be better, I wish my husband could have a mother and be a son-in-law with my mother, but he can't, so neither one of will know what that relationship is like. We only know a toxic relationship.

I see other people have the relationship I thought that I would have with my mother in-law. I think of all the people who told me how great she was, and I would be part of the family. I feel like these people lied to me. I feel like my husband lied to me, when he told me how much we were alike. I feel like now that is an insult.

Yes, I'm pretty sure that I have a monster-in-law.

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About the Creator

Amanda J Mollett

First, and foremost I am a mom…always . I am a proud mom of a graduate & artist. I am a author/writer and a journalist. I have multiple certificates in journalism and various writing certificates such as novel writing and creative writing.

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