Married To A Foreigner

I am Venezuelan married to a Swedish woman and we have been married for 9 years. On January 11, 2012 in the civil registry, I accepted before the Swedish laws and Stina as my wife, to love and respect her until death do us part.

What I did not take into account was that at the same time I was marrying in a certain way also with Sweden, its culture and customs (until death do us part). Not a minor fact to consider at the moment of saying yes and joining in marriage with another person.

Undoubtedly, maintaining a good and happy marriage is not an easy task. At the beginning of my marriage there were cultural differences and different points of view. Now it is easier, I know the Swedish culture and way of being better and most importantly I have learned to know and love my wife even better.

One thing to avoid when married to a foreigner is comparisons between your own countries. It is very difficult, as it is very human to make comparisons, so it is almost inevitable.

However, it is possible to compare healthily, without the need to compete to know who has the better country. Especially if both are very patriotic (I am the most patriotic of all).

Communication is fundamental. Don't keep quiet about what you don't like. Learn to express what we feel and think especially when both are from two different cultures.

It is true that no matter what country we are from, no one has the power to know what is in the other person's head. That is why developing and activating communication in marriage on a daily basis is more than important, isn't it?

Language is culture and through language you can get to know the country and its idiosyncrasies better. For this reason it is very significant to try to learn your spouse's mother tongue.

You can say I love you to me in many languages, but the one that will touch my heart the most will always be an I love you in Spanish, my mother tongue. It is also very useful for you to be able to communicate and interact with your family and friends, otherwise you would be a stranger to them.

When two people come together to form a family and both are from different countries and cultures, an interesting and excellent cultural mix is achieved, which is very enriching. In this way you can make those customs that most please the couple.

In my case I am very spoiled, so a large percentage are perhaps my own traditions and customs. Although we live in Sweden.

Swedes are very independent and since they are 18 years old they leave their parents' house to live on their own. This is a great advantage for me as I am married to a Swedish woman, since we both work, therefore we both share equally the household chores as well as other chores and responsibilities in general.

If you had told me years ago that I would be living, working in Sweden and married to a Swedish woman I would never have believed it. That is exactly the spark of life, we never know what the future will bring, let alone what situation we will be in later on. On the other hand, what I can control and improve is the motivation to be a better person, son, husband, brother, friend and more.

And finally I want to leave this advice:

"In addition to being a couple, be friends, because friends last forever."

I think this advice is nice enough to try to complement it with more words, don't you think?