Infertility, Resilience, and Surrogacy: Maggie & Jessie’s Journey to Baby Josie

As Told by Maggie and Jessie, ConceiveAbilities Intended Mother and Surrogate

Infertility affects millions of individuals and couples, and the journey to parenthood through assisted reproductive technology or surrogacy is often deeply personal and filled with challenges. For Infertility Awareness Week, we’re sharing intended parent Maggie and her surrogate Jessie’s story — a powerful testament to the resilience, heartbreak, and ultimate hope that defines so many infertility journeys.

Listen to Maggie and Jessie’s full podcast about their surrogacy journey with Infertile AF.

The Beginning: A Long Road to Parenthood

For years, Maggie endured a challenging journey to motherhood, facing numerous fertility treatments, heartbreaking losses, and unanswered questions. Despite undergoing extensive medical testing and interventions, she continued to experience pregnancy loss with no clear explanation.

A Journey of Resilience: Navigating Infertility and Finding a New Path

Maggie: If you had told me years ago that my path to motherhood would be filled with heartbreak, loss, and, ultimately, the incredible gift of surrogacy, I wouldn’t have believed you. Infertility is a journey no one expects to take.Yet, so many of us find ourselves walking this difficult road, filled with uncertainty, grief, and hope. As Infertility Awareness Week approaches, I want to share my story — the raw, unfiltered truth about what it took to finally hold my daughter, Josie, in my arms.

My husband and I tried for five years to conceive. Five years filled with seven rounds of IUI, three miscarriages, and an endless rollercoaster of hope and disappointment. When my OB/GYN finally referred us to an IVF specialist, we thought we had our answer. IVF would solve everything, right?

I underwent an egg retrieval and three transfers. Two failed, and the third ended in yet another miscarriage. Every embryo had been PGT-tested, meaning they were chromosomally normal. There was no explanation. I went through every test imaginable — blood clotting disorders, DNA translocations, lupus — but everything came back normal. And yet, my body continued to betray me.

We tried everything — antibiotics, steroids, immunotherapy. But when my last miscarriage happened in the wake of a severe burn accident that left me hospitalized with skin grafts, I knew I couldn’t keep doing this. I had to find another way.

Turning to Surrogacy

After enduring physical and emotional exhaustion, Maggie turned to surrogacy. She connected with ConceiveAbilities and was eager to take this next step. However, the process required patience, as the COVID-19 pandemic extended the matching timeline.

The First Attempt: Surrogate Ashley

Eventually, she matched with her first surrogate, Ashley, and they embarked on their journey together. Despite their best efforts, three embryo transfers with Ashley were unsuccessful. Devastated, Maggie faced another painful decision — should she continue, or was this the end of her dream of having a child? After taking time to process the emotional toll, she decided to move forward with a second surrogate, Jessie.

Maggie on the Decision to Try Again

Maggie: We did three transfers with our first surrogate Ashley. None worked. Again, no explanation. My doctor gently told us that we needed to move on, and I hit one of my lowest points. I left my corporate job. I needed a break from the constant cycle of hope and heartbreak. When we matched with our second surrogate, Jessica, I was hesitant to let myself believe it would work. But on our very first transfer, she got pregnant.

Jessie’s Story: A Surrogate’s Calling Inspired by Infertility

Jessie, Maggie’s second surrogate, had always loved being pregnant. She had witnessed her sister’s struggles with IVF and saw firsthand the emotional toll that infertility can take on individuals and couples.

Why Jessie Chose to Become a Surrogate

Jessie: Simply put, I like being pregnant. I enjoy the experience and I’ve always felt incredibly blessed to have uncomplicated pregnancies and to conceive when I wanted to. But I also know that not everyone has that experience — my sister had to go through IVF for her pregnancies\I witnessed firsthand the emotional, mental, and financial struggles that come with infertility.

After I had my twins, my husband and I knew our family was complete. That’s when I decided I wanted to carry for someone who couldn’t carry on their own.

I reached out to ConceiveAbilities, thinking there was no way I’d qualify to be a surrogate — maybe I was too old, or I had too many babies. But I kept moving forward, and when they asked me what kind of intended parents I wanted to be matched with, my heart was set on a couple who had struggled with infertility. That’s when I met Matt and Maggie.

When I heard their story, I was immediately intimidated. They had already been through so much — including a failed surrogacy journey before me. What if I failed them too? What if I couldn’t do this? The pressure was overwhelming and I remember telling the team at ConceiveAbilities, “I don’t know if I can do this.” But they reassured me. “This is exactly what you wanted,” they reminded me. And they were right. I pushed through my fears, and we decided to move forward together.

The Journey Together: Building a Strong Relationship

Maggie and Jessie’s relationship evolved over time, navigating the ups and downs of the surrogacy journey. Despite challenges, including high-risk pregnancy complications, their bond grew stronger.

Jessie’s Reflections on Their Relationship

Jessie: Our relationship was a learning process at first. Matt and Maggie had been through so much trauma, and I had to navigate what my role was — how much to communicate, what to share, and how to support them in a way that felt right for them. But once we found our rhythm, we hit it off.

Maggie’s Reflections on Their Connection

Maggie: We got closer and closer. We probably saw each other more than most surrogate and intended parent connections because of all the meetings. It was such a positive aspect of the journey. We became really close, and even though I sometimes felt jealous of my friends’ pregnancies, I never felt that way about Jessie. By that point, I felt like I had someone on my team. She was carrying my baby, and while she was the one pregnant, I knew she was doing it for me. We were in this together.

A Successful Transfer and Pregnancy Challenges

Jessie’s first embryo transfer was successful, and for the first time in years, Maggie felt hope. But at the 10-week mark, the pregnancy took a concerning turn when the OB identified potential complications with the placenta. Throughout a high risk pregnancy that required extensive monitoring, their relationship grew and became even stronger.

Jessie on the Experience of Carrying Josie

Jessie: We got pregnant on our first transfer — an incredible blessing. From that point on, I stepped into my role fully: I was carrying their child and I was going to support them every step of the way. It was a roller coaster but I felt like my experience as a hospice nurse prepared me for it.

My job is to support people in some of life’s most difficult moments and, in many ways, I found myself stepping into that same role with Matt and Maggie. I believe people are brought into our lives for a reason and this journey reaffirmed why I do what I do.

Maggie on the Anxiety of Placenta Complications

Maggie: At 10 weeks, after graduating from my fertility clinic, Jessica’s OB noticed something: placenta lakes.

After everything we had been through, the thought of losing another baby — especially one that was growing inside someone else — was unimaginable.

The rest of the pregnancy was fraught with stress, constant monitoring, and new diagnoses every few weeks. But Jessica carried our baby with unwavering strength and, finally, after years of heartbreak, my daughter Josie was born.

A Miraculous Outcome

After years of challenges and emotional rollercoasters, Josie was born healthy. The emotional moment of Josie’s birth was a culmination of Maggie and Jessie’s shared strength and hope.

Jessie’s Reflections on the Birth

Jessie: The birth was an adventure of its own. At 37 weeks, I thought my water had broken, so I called Maggie and Matt. They were already on their way to Minnesota from Chicago, but Maggie decided to hop on a flight just to get here faster. Turns out, my water hadn’t broken — I had just peed my pants. I was mortified. “Oh my goodness, you just flew here on a last-minute flight because I peed my pants,” I told her. Thankfully, she was a great sport about it.

Then came induction day. I thought it would be quick — I’d be home the next day. But my body had other plans. After three days of trying to induce me with no success, I had to have a C-section which I had hoped to avoid. But in the end, it was a magical experience.

When they delivered Josie, they lowered the drape so we could see her. Maggie was right behind me and we watched as they pressed Josie up against the clear plastic sheet, letting us touch her little hands. It was such a surreal moment — so emotional, so beautiful, and so rewarding. Lifechanging.

Now, Josie is thriving and I couldn’t be happier. My journey as a surrogate was one of the most fulfilling experiences of my life. And while my job as a hospice nurse is different in so many ways, it all comes back to the same thing: being there for others in the moments that matter most.

The Moment Maggie Had Waited For

Maggie: Jessie let us all be in the delivery room. We had built a real connection with the entire delivery team. The fact that it was a surrogacy journey and had taken so long made it even more special. Even though many of them were technically off the clock, they stayed around, saying they were invested in this. Some were taking photos for us or just wanted to see the baby before they left. There were like 20 people in the room!

Jessie is not just my friend — she’s family and I love her so much. She is so gracious and wonderful. Thinking about her brings me to tears. I needed her presence in my life, not just because she carried my baby, but because she’s such an incredible person. Her husband is equally wonderful and the four of us get along so well.

When I think about Josie, I know she was always meant to be. I wear a diamond necklace with four diamonds to honor the babies I lost, but I often wonder, what if I hadn’t chosen that female embryo for Jessie? It was always meant to be Josie. And even though the path wasn’t what I expected, it was the greatest gift. In the end, I believe it worked out exactly how it was meant to, even with the challenges. Now, we have Jessie and her family in our lives and I couldn’t be more grateful.

Why Infertility Awareness Matters

Maggie and Jessie’s story is a powerful reminder of the resilience and hope that defines many infertility journeys. Infertility is painful and isolating but, through surrogacy, Maggie was able to build the family she had always dreamed of.

Maggie’s Advice to Others Facing Infertility

Maggie: I share my story in the hopes that someone out there feels a little less alone. Even in the darkest moments, hope is still there, waiting to find you.

Infertility is brutal. It’s isolating, expensive, and emotionally exhausting. But, through it all, I learned the importance of community, of having people who understand, and of seeking support in places I never expected.

For those of you in the trenches of infertility, I see you. I know the pain of yet another negative test, the crushing disappointment of failed cycles, and the impossible choice of deciding when to stop trying. I know the fear that you may never hold a child of your own. Only you can make that decision of if your body’s had enough, if you’ve emotionally had enough. And I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer. If you’re struggling, please don’t do it alone. Find support, talk to others who have been there, and know that your story isn’t over yet. There are options and there is hope.

There are many paths to parenthood. To intended parents, my advice would be to stay open to the possibilities. Mine led me to surrogacy and, while it wasn’t the path I expected, it was the one that gave me my daughter.

Jessie on Surrogacy’s Impact

Jessie: Infertility awareness is so important. There are so many people who need help growing their families and surrogacy is one way to make that possible. I’m forever grateful for the journey I shared with Matt, Maggie, and Josie and I hope that by sharing my story, others might consider the incredible gift of surrogacy too.

Raising Awareness and Offering Support

Infertility is not just about medical treatments; it’s about the emotional rollercoaster, the sacrifices, and the unrelenting hope that one day a family will be complete.

During Infertility Awareness Week, at ConceiveAbilities, we honor the strength of those navigating this journey. Whether through surrogacy or other paths to parenthood, we stand with you, acknowledge your struggles, and celebrate your resilience.