I'm Sorry I'm Too Short To Help You

A daughter's life was turned upside down the moment she heard her mother tell her that she only had a few months to live. It's like a gut punch and you forget how to breathe again.

The daughter rushed home to be by her mother's side and be with her mother to the end. As the days grew closer, her mother's sister Susan arrived and wanted to move in and be close. Laura had been doing what was needed to take care of her mother Debra. The height difference was a foot and a few inches. Susan had no problems with anything. Susan did nothing but put Laura down in front of her dying mother. Exaggerating and saying that Laura was too short to do anything and that Laura was jealous of tall people and ANY tall person that was taking care of HER sister. Susan made it clear that she didn't care if Debra was Laura's mother because it was HER sister and since it was HER sister, she figured she knew more about EVERYTHING when she didn't.

Susan wanted more control and didn't like the fact that in some fashion that Laura was being appreciated more and more by Debra. Susan was becoming jealous of all that Laura was doing. Susan stormed out of the room after yelling and degrading/scolding Laura which left Debra to cry. She apologized for Susan's behavior and said she had never expected Susan to do/say anything like she said/did to Laura. Laura tried to convince her mother it was okay and not to worry. Debra shouldn't have to deal with that sort of stress. All she should focus on was living. Not this. Debra laid on her side and told her daughter to stay there with her. Not to leave the room. Debra wanted to go to sleep and thought that she could still protect her daughter as she lies in the hospital bed from her sister. As Debra closed her eyes to sleep, she wiped the tears from Debra's face and then kissed her cheek. Laura sat back down in the chair and stayed in the room with her mother for a couple of hours. Susan realized that Laura wasn't leaving the room so she came in the room, sat in Debra's wheelchair at the end of the bed and placed her feet over the foot of the hospital bed onto the mattress and wanted to again start talking about how Laura needs to stop being jealous of taller people who help Debra, how Laura is causing drama and stressing Susan out and how dare Laura move Debra earlier. Susan just wanted to rehash again what she had screamed about earlier. Debra opened up her eyes and told her sister to stop, she had heard enough. Susan didn't care. She kept saying she wasn't going to let Laura do whatever she wants. She kept making up excuses as to why she had a right to yell at Laura. In the end, it was because she (Susan) was jealous that HER sister Debra was paying attention to her daughter Laura. Susan was tired of HER sister Debra telling people how unhappy she was with her sister (Susan) and the behavior she was showing.

Soon after, Laura had to return back to her home for a week or so and needed to take care of her stuff at her home. Before Laura was able to return, Susan contacted Laura's other siblings with lies and made it clear that Laura was not welcome to come back to take care of her dying mother Debra. Laura's siblings never asked what was going on. They took Susan's word for whatever she said.

What should have been a time for the family to come together, Susan made sure she was tearing it apart. She claimed to have "attachment issues" with their own mother, but since their mother had passed some years ago, she attached herself to HER sister and didn't care who she hurt. She wasn't going to let anyone come between her and her sister and would do anything to separate anyone who she thought was getting more attention than she was.

Susan made sure she had Laura's siblings hide information from her regarding their mother/HER sister. Laura would call and ask, text and was told by Susan that Laura's sibling was supposed to be calling all the siblings and filling them in on what was going on. It wasn't her problem that no one was saying anything. It wasn't her job to fill Laura in about her own mother. She came up with excuses as to why Laura wasn't able to speak to her mother for the last few weeks of her mother's life. First, Susan said that Debra didn't want to talk to her. Then Susan changed the story and said that Debra was disappointed in her and would talk to her when she was no longer disappointed in her. Disappointed? When did Laura's mother, all of a sudden, become disappointed? What did Laura supposedly do? Susan couldn't even explain what Debra was disappointed about to Laura's siblings because what she was saying wasn't true.

A week before Debra died, Susan was already going through her sister's house and emptying it out. She was quick to get rid of whatever she could and Laura's sibling Lana was quick to participate in getting rid of what they could. Laura was saddened to find out that Susan, who kept telling everyone how much she loved HER sister, was so quick to get rid of everything quickly. She wanted the house. That's what Susan wanted. Her sister's house. She didn't care about her dying sister in the next room. IF Susan did, her concern would not be about what she was going to get rid of.

Minutes before Debra died, Laura was supposed to be called. That never happened. The family stood there and did nothing to let Laura say goodbye to her mother. No video call. No phone call. Nothing.

Shortly after Debra's body was removed from the house and the family had left the house, Susan bagged up more stuff of HER sister's to throw in the garbage. The neighbors were watching in horror. Some of the neighbors called Laura who lived out of state and said everything that was going on. It was nothing but a horror story. It's a disaster!

Debra's legacy and life ended up meaning nothing in the end because of what Susan had turned it to become. No one asked questions, they just went by what Susan said. Susan made a mockery of Laura's mother and a couple of the siblings went along for the ride without stopping it.

In the end, you get to find out who people become when blood hits the water. The sharks come out. You don't know who people are until death comes. Then you see the real person come out. You see what they were hiding. You see who they have pretended to be through the years and who they have turned out to be.

You get to see how an individual(s) feel about others in the end. It makes you question your entire life as far back as you can remember. It makes you question yourself as to why you could be so stupid as to believe what the person/people have said to you and wanted you to believe.

Laura lives with the memory now of never saying goodbye. Her last image of her mother was of Debra crying and apologizing to Laura about how her sister Susan was treating Laura and Laura trying to tell her mom it was okay and not to worry. The next image Laura will eventually have is her mother's headstone. No last moment with her mother. That precious time was stolen.

So before you have your parent's siblings move in if you are helping to take care of a dying parent, I'd think twice about it. Sadly, you may have your dying parents' siblings say that they have your back and then side with their sibling that is there as you are trying to fulfill your parent's wishes.

If a sibling hasn't been around your parent and all of a sudden they pretend to know everything when they know nothing at all it just makes the situation worse. You need someone that will work with you and not against you because someone has "attachment issues". You can't have someone drive a wedge between all the siblings just because and then want to act like you are this Aunt who is going to come in and fix the problems that YOU created.

What's sad is that some of the Aunt's siblings know how well the person plays the victim and expressed their concerns about the person being there to take care of their dying sister and praised the daughter being there.

Watch who comes into the home! Watch who the sharks are! Watch out for your dying parent!