How am I supposed to feel about being a stay at home mom?

All the joy and excitement of finding out you’re pregnant and bringing a ball of joy into this world fades away sometimes. Everyone may not relate but this is how I feel and maybe someone else in this world feels the same. There are so many different emotions that run through us and sometimes we forget that we are human. We lose ourselves while learning to love, care for, and enjoy our children.

I love my sweet little boy and I wouldn’t change being able to watch him grow up and not miss anything. It is a luxury to be able to be a stay at home mom home but do we all look at it like that? Growing up you have so many dreams but sometimes they get put on hold or your dreams change. My dreams changed the day I was told I would have a difficult time having children. My dream then became fighting all the odds against me and my what my body was capable of. I was blessed with a sweet baby boy. Watching him grow in my stomach was amazing, I had an easy pregnancy despite being considered high risk. I watched stretch marks form and little feet trying to kick out. When I was pregnant I fought myself between watching my body do something so amazing and watching my body get bigger so fast. You change emotionally and physically while growing a child.

After your child is born you learn how to raise and care for something so tiny and fragile while trying to heal your own body. The days are long but so fast at the same time. Your heart is filled with so much love. Watching your child learn to do something new everyday is so rewarding but sad at the same time. I mention sad because it goes by so fast. It’s like you blink and they are already walking and talking. You’re so proud of everything they do. But if you step back to think, in all this time of raising your child, did you forget who you were as a person in the adult world? I think all the time about how useless I am in the adult world. I don’t bring anything home like my husband does. He helps raise our child and work all at the same time.

The biggest lesson I have learned being a stay at home mom is to focus on what I’m bringing to the home. Yes, my husband makes the money but I am taking care of our little boy at home. I’m teaching him all about life as he grows into this world. I teach him about the home and world and his dad teaches him work ethic and how to provide for his family. In this world, you’re very fortunate if you can afford to have a nanny or a babysitter. It is hard to live off of one income and sometimes even if you want to work as well, your whole paycheck goes to paying someone who gets to spend all the quality time with your children, unless you make the big bucks. I would love to work but I would hate to miss all these moments with my sweet boy.

The biggest point throughout this is you may feel useless but you aren’t. You aren’t useless to those little eyes that look up at you everyday. You aren’t useless when they get a boo-boo and ask you to kiss it better. You are doing amazing. Also, if you’re a working mom, you are doing amazing too. You are doing something I wish I could do. You learned to balance life correctly. I wish this world made it easier for stay at home moms and working moms. There should be no judgment on either. Sometimes we have to do what we need to so we can survive.

At the end of the day, please don’t forget about yourself. Don’t forget to take care of yourself while you’re taking care of everyone else. Make sure to eat, shower, take some time to yourself, and most importantly, make sure to love yourself. Be proud of being a mother. It takes more than giving birth to a child to be a mother or father.