Hiking with my mother-in-law

Raise your hand if you have dated a male human before! (That was just an illustration. If your hand is up right now you have just made this horribly awkward.) If you have dated a man/boy/male it is highly likely that the single most important relationship in their life is the relationship with their mom. Mommas are a big deal! But for our menfolk, mommas show them exactly what to expect in a woman. They are also (usually) the most consistent source of comfort and structure. Some of you are having flashbacks of those incredible comparative statements “that’s not how my mom makes that” or “my mom never did it that way”… Please understand that their sweet boy brain really isn’t trying to be harmful – they just really like patterns. Regardless, one of the greatest gestures a lady can make is pursuing a relationship with her man’s momma.

Now, I have been incredibly blessed. Both Josh’s Mom, Nicki, and Grandma, Minnie, are genuine, sassy, easy to talk to. They share a very close bond so time spent with them often includes giggles, bickering, and reminiscing. They are charming as individuals and endearing as a pair. So, when they suggested a fall day trip to Ha Ha Tonka state park I could not agree fast enough!

Ha Ha Tonka is a gorgeous park in Southern Missouri known for the ruins of a mansion destroyed by fire – it is also historically significant for native tribes and settlers. The park guarantees paved trails, gorgeous views, and interesting bits of education. We would be joined on our trip by Nicki’s best friend, Marilyn – a quiet, shy individual, with a calming demeanor. The GPS estimated nearly 3 hours to our destination so we planned a whole day for the adventure. Our little jaunt could only be one day though, because it was planned for a weekday, and while all the other ladies are retired – I am not.

It is important to explain that the term ‘adventure’, while not typically used when describing activities with moms and grandmas, would be completely accurate for this group. The last time that Nicki and I had a “girl’s day” I ended up honking the horn of my car with my rear end and she gave the ‘driver’s salute’ to an unsuspecting man in a jeep – we decided early on that we do not have to play by the rules.

We gathered for our road trip early in the morning. Nicki would be driving Minnie’s car, though Minnie objected at every opportunity – and there were plenty of opportunities to suggest “Maybe Abby should drive”. We picked up Marilyn on the way and we were off! The chatter in the vehicle was just as expected – random stories, laughing, gossip, the usual hen fest. Annnddd…. We missed the exit – “Maybe Abby should drive”. After hours of driving, we stopped for lunch – and asked for directions. See, we were now in an area where the GPS no longer worked, although, following the instructions from that device proved to be more challenging than anticipated.

We finally arrived at our destination – Ha Ha Tonka State Park! Leg stretching, gathering jackets – annnddd…. We have lost Minnie. Don’t worry, she was already hustling down the paved trail, cane in hand, towards mansion ruins. As our group reassembles, stories of recent falls are being casually tossed about. I become very nervous. I have traveled hours from home to walk with 3 women who find staying vertical a difficult task – I feel as though I need to be very alert to everyone’s movements. We make our way through all the ruins, viewing all the changing fall leaves, peering over cliffs, and reading stories of the mansion from little plaques placed throughout the area. Nicki and I made stories of our own to describe the family that lived there and the happenings of the property. We finished our time in that area and traveled to the next section of the park – a landbridge. Now, I was clearly promised paved trails. However, the path to the landbridge was not only not paved, but quite treacherous. The recent rain had washed out the natural stairs and passage. Hiking. I am now hiking with 3 fall risks. Their zest for life has driven them to this level of activity. Minnie and I lean on each other down the rocky trail, finding footholds and semi-safe surfaces for placing our weight. All of this effort to see a beautiful rock structure straddling a deep valley full of sharp rocks and little rivers of rain water.

What goes up, must come down – but in this case, it is just the opposite. Our little tribe must now make our way up the mountain that we just traversed down. Again, this entire path is washed out. We choose our steps carefully, Minnie and I taking our time. As we are nearly to the top, Minnie informs me “Not everyone can say that they knew their husband’s grandmother, but you will be able to say that” – perhaps she knows something that I don’t. Josh and I are not married but she seems to think that potential is in our future. I love the idea! Now, her timing… Hinting that I would be married to her grandson while we are on a trail of sliding rocks did not solicit my most graceful response. We did however make it to the top of the hill safely.

There was only one more hike in the day. While it was a mile in total, this time it was completely paved and uneventful. We saw a gorgeous natural spring that looked like teal ribbons when we saw it from the top of cliffs near the ruins. When we finally made it back to the car every ounce of active energy we had was completely expended. But our day was far from over. The drive back proved to be its own adventure. We missed nearly every GPS suggested turn – each time hearing “Maybe Abby should drive”. The zigging and zagging across the state left us with plenty of time to hear stories, share laughs, and plan for our next escapade.

Again, I am incredibly blessed – my time with Nicki and Minnie is a consistent source of laughs and sass. I am very much looking forward to what our next adventures hold.