El Mirage Youth

I think our ultimate goal, as parents, is to raise our children so they don’t have to recover from their childhoods.

My childhood was so great that sometimes I miss it. As a child, though, I didn’t know that not every child is blessed with two loving, attentive parents in a clean home on 15 acres of land in the country on which to run around, explore, go fishing, play, and of course, learn a thing or two…like how to check the oil in a car, when to plant a garden, and how to filet a fish. Some kids aren’t even blessed with one loving parent, or any person, in their life, and this breaks my heart.

My passion is for children to grow up being loved and to grow into productive members of society. These productive members of society will, in theory, have their own children who will know they are loved and appreciated because their parents were loved and appreciated, and they will continue the positive cycle. This all contributes to a better and better society as the generations pass from one to the next.

My membership program will fund a sort of preschool and after-school program for children in my community of El Mirage, Arizona. Members will pay a monthly membership to the El Mirage Youth. Each month, members will be sent a beautiful handmade card with artwork and a note from one of the youths in the program. On the member’s yearly anniversary, they will have the opportunity to choose one piece of artwork from throughout the year made into fine jewelry: a necklace, a bracelet, a keychain, or a ring.

The program will not only focus on art and handmade cards. There will also be homework help available. There will be games such as pool, cards, and air hockey for recreation. There will be counselors on staff to speak with any children who want to talk. All staff members will be trained to assess each child on a daily basis and look for any changes in the children’s normal character and behavior. Everything is designed to give the child the feeling of safety and a “home away from home.”

The name “El Mirage Youth” might seem misleading because there will be classes available to parents as well. We know that parents set the tone for the home, so we cannot leave them out. There will be a focus on those who are parents for the first time. Parenting can be overwhelming, and especially so if the parent is a young adult. A lot of young parents don’t understand themselves yet, so how can we expect them to try to understand a child as well as themselves? The classes will help the new parents budget their time and money wisely in order to help their home operate efficiently. Money problems are one of the main causes of divorce. If the parents are married, this will, hopefully, help alleviate problems in that area. The hope is that by removing money problems from the household, that’s one less problem to add stress and help break up a home. If the parent is single, learning to budget time and money will also relieve stress from the home and prepare that parent for a possible future marriage. When the parents are not stressed, the children will not be stressed.

The bodies and minds of new moms are still going through changes that we also can’t expect them to understand and get through successfully by themselves. After I gave birth to my first child fifteen years ago, I came down with the “baby blues” the very moment her umbilical cord was cut from me.

The baby blues is defined as a period of sadness for a few days after a woman gives birth. However, if the baby blues lasts for about 10 days or longer, it can be classified as postpartum depression. Postpartum depression is defined as a major depression after giving birth and it can cause mood changes, insomnia, loss of appetite, irritability, inability to bond with the baby, fear, unwanted thoughts, inability to concentrate, a lot of crying, etc…and it can last for months. My “baby blues” turned into postpartum depression, which turned into severe postpartum depression, and it lasted for about 5 years. Two years into my depression, I was already giving birth to my second child. So here I was with two babies, severe depression, and a helpless husband who, so badly, wanted me to get better. The doctors didn’t know what to do for me, and I was hoping that I would just snap out of it one day. I came onto me suddenly, so I guess I was hoping it would just go away suddenly. I was prescribed antidepressant after antidepressant, and I only seemed to be feeling worse and worse. I would sit and cry. I didn’t know why I was crying. I just knew that I felt that I was in complete despair. My husband didn’t know what to do for me other than sit and hold me whenever I needed him.

Eventually, the feelings and thoughts of despair got the best of me, and my beautiful marriage came to an end. I think if I knew then what I know now, I probably wouldn’t have gotten a divorce, and maybe I could have been a better mother to my two older children. By my fifth year of severe depression, I was readily trying to take control of my mind and my thoughts. It worked! I was able to come out of my depression through a lot of trial and error, but I know I can’t be the only woman who has ever gone through anything like this. I think there isn’t enough help and resources for new moms to make sure they don’t succumb to postpartum depression after giving birth to their babies. That is why there will be counseling and people to speak with at El Mirage Youth.

There will be no charges to parents for this program. It will be fully funded by membership. It will be open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week because problems at home and hard times don’t know what day or time it is. All the programs and classes may not be available 24 hours a day, but the building will be available as a safe place.

El Mirage Youth will be a safe haven for any young people around the age of 30 and under, but there is not a set age limit. This is a place of love, acceptance, teaching, and healing.

As the Nigerian proverb says, “It takes a village to raise a child,” El Mirage will be the first of its kind in the modern world where the village really WILL be raising the children.