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Does the birth of a child with the mother's last name indicate an increase in women's rights?

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By MejraPublished 2 years ago 9 min read
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Does the birth of a child with the mother's last name indicate an increase in women's rights?
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash

So one sentence, the whole family is considered to have exploded, because my old home is in the village, so the village of the elderly is relatively conservative.

For example, my sister-in-law, and her in-laws are dying all day long, and my brother is just burying his head in a cigarette and drinking wine every day, not saying anything.

Of course, the final result of this matter is still relatively good, the family was divided into two people, the old sister-in-law and my brother divorced.

The child is one person, who does not compete.

This matter will have to start from the beginning, in the early years of my old sister-in-law and my brother on the idea of the dink.

By Markus Spiske on Unsplash

Dink we all understand, is not to have children, after almost 10 years or so, the old sister-in-law and my brother in law emotional crisis, the two contradictions between the heavy.

My biggest hobby every day is to drop some plates or cups on the floor and break them into pieces.

After a long time, my brother thought to himself that this is not a problem, so he had a child to relieve the boredom, but of course, there may be other reasons in the middle.

The final decision to have a child was made by my brother and my sister-in-law.

But I didn't think that this time when giving birth to a child with too much force, directly out of a twin.

What's worse is that during this period of childbirth, the old sister-in-law is willing to brush some paragraphs, on the willingness to read some chicken soup bloggers say.

And these bloggers are invariably talking about a topic, that is, the woman's social status must be reflected in the child in the family name.

According to the old sister-in-law, the child is born to me and you other people have nothing to do with it, even if I do not have this husband, I can still give birth to the child, so who is the most difficult to give birth to a child? Of course, it's me.

As the oldest sister-in-law in the family, and as the woman with the highest social status, it is not too much to ask that my two children follow my family name.

I do not know why the old sister-in-law would put forward such a point of view, and even the old sister-in-law also said, you see people a certain chicken soup blogger said.

If a woman in the family gave birth to a child, the child can not be with their mother's surname, it means that no one in the whole family respects the mother of the child, why can not I get your respect? I gave birth to the child.

Anyone who has experienced it understands that this situation is not my sister-in-law deliberately picking a fight, probably because she was hit or stimulated in the process of giving birth to a child or has a very strong sense of insecurity.

My brother on the side just needs to comfort, big deal, let the child follow the old sister-in-law's surname on the line.

But my brother is a bit of a problem, my brother is the typical bullhorn and macho.

The day inside my brother always said no matter what difficulties there are what hardships and obstacles, the sky is falling I help you carry.

My brother's so-called machismo cast a deep shadow over the family marriage, and at that time my brother said, you want to let the children follow your family name no problem, but we have to divorce.

The old sister-in-law has been spoiled and loved by her brother, so the old sister-in-law thought that her brother said this in angry words.

At the same time, my sister-in-law thought to herself, you can say angry words, why can't I say angry words, in that case, you are angry with me, I am also angry with you.

So my old sister-in-law said directly: divorce is divorce, do not you think I am afraid of you?

The old sister-in-law finished this sentence, and my brother, even directly on the slope to my old sister-in-law to unload the donkey.

So the old sister-in-law gave birth to a child, and two years later the old sister-in-law was baffled, the child's surname is indeed determined, and the two children's surnames with their surname, but what is the significance of the child's surname to follow their own, their husband is even gone.

What's even more annoying is that her husband said, to either let the children follow her husband's surname, or grab the time to leave home.

At that time, my old sister-in-law could not say a word, every day in tears.

Tossed to the end really can not say: this way, we have two children with a separate surname, okay, you gave birth to the daughter with your surname, I gave birth to the son with my surname.

My brother listened to the brain baffled, these two children are born to you, how there I was born.

According to you, the child has nothing to do with me, ah, anyway I do not care, you look after yourself to be good.

In this sentence you look to come as you add fuel to the fire, the old sister-in-law originally thought to communicate with my brother, but the results look as if there is no need to communicate.

In addition, the old sister-in-law's parents' side is also more axis, according to the old sister-in-law's parents' side, is it not the child's surname?

Let's not talk about the child's surname, let's talk about it, even if the child is not born to you you don't want it.

My brother listened to it, he suddenly felt his head green, and then to the old sister-in-law's parents said: Of course, not I was born, I want this child what, I spend money to people for charity.

And then the old sister-in-law's parents on the side still have strong words to say: but look at people abroad, people abroad are very respectful of women, they are willing to put the status of women high.

Then my brother heard and said: you quickly stop it, but also abroad, do you know that if a woman marries a man, even the woman's surname has to be changed to a man's surname?

What are you kidding? How is disrespectful, thousands of years of old heritage, the world has done so, to me here to come up with exceptions, I invite you to mess with you.

My brother is getting more and more emotional, in the end, the result is obvious, the two people certainly can not go together, plus the old sister-in-law's parents on the side secretly sowing discord, so the matter is so.

Of course, the reason why the two divorced the main reason is that my brother said a word, and the old sister-in-law immediately felt no steps.

At that time, my brother said, you said that after the birth of a child follow the mother's family name to show the family respect for women.

Then I wonder, you should also follow your mother's surname, your mother should follow your grandmother's surname, your whole family should follow the surname of the mother, how do you turn to it?

This sentence was so offensive that my old sister-in-law could not speak for half a day after opening her mouth, and then threw the only glass left in her hand on the floor.

The other cups in the house are replaced with stainless steel, the old sister-in-law took the children and left, but with two children left, found their husbands did not stop themselves halfway, and more damaging is that they can not support two children alone, tossed to the end of a child this family is also so scattered.

The first point is why is it so difficult to let the child follow the mother's surname.

Perhaps many partners are thinking, it is just a surname, follow whose surname is not with it, if I do not say let the child follow the mother's surname, you are following the surname of the old king next door, there is no problem, whatever, anyway, I have no feelings for the family.

The biggest resistance to this situation is often found in men or men's parents or men's families, who resent the idea of their children following someone else's surname.

All this is mainly traced back to ancient times, in ancient times the matriarchal clan world, that time the mother said.

The mother can guarantee that the children born are born to her, but can not guarantee who the father of the child is.

So the child's father became a loafer, patting his buttocks and turning his head away, leaving the orphans and widows to suffer in this piece.

Later, the mother gave the child's name to the father, but also an invisible yoke, so that the father to produce a sense of responsibility.

The lineage has been passed down for thousands of years just slowly blossoming, without any major problems up to now.

Suddenly we have to tell each other that the conjugal society can no longer exist and that it must be turned back into what was or could have been abolished into a matriarchal society, which is a very difficult thing to do.

Unless the mother is a strong woman, has a very high social status in society, and has a very large property in the family to inherit, it is very difficult to change the family name directly.

The second point, the children following the mother's surname is excessive.

Then we combine this matter to analyze the specific if the child following the mother's surname, is a very excessive thing.

It is not as excessive as imagined, after all, the child is born to the mother, and the mother and father do have the right to decide what the child's surname is.

But note that for some special areas, especially in rural areas, for example.

It is a given that a child who suddenly takes the mother's surname instead of the father will be poked and prodded by the village, and it is also likely that the child will suffer school violence inside the school.

So if we don't extrapolate backward, if your child can withstand the pressure at school, if your child's parents can also withstand the pressure, and more importantly if your child takes the mother's surname, both parents approve of this and both think there is nothing wrong with it.

Then the child with the mother in principle there will be no major problems, otherwise, it is advisable to be more cautious.

After all, a family of origin is not easy to set up, don't really because the child's surname fell out, between the two sides feel they have a reason, but this reason can not be a meal ah.

humanity
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About the Creator

Mejra

Later, respectively, wander and suffer sorrow.

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