Breakaway from the Notion that GRIEF has a CERTAIN timeline.

My cousin Donnie Meredith lost the love of his life Shannon Boswell on Halloween night 2020. Shannon started complaining of chest pains so Donnie rushed her to the Elmore County Hospital, he took her inside, signed her in, and the hospital staff instructed him to wait outside due to COVID-19.  Sadly, while Donnie was patiently waiting outside in his vehicle for his sweet Shannon to receive treatment, her health took a drastic turn for the worst. Shannon had a heart attack and passed away. This sudden and tragic lost has devastated Donnie and they regrettably did  not prepare for funeral expenses because she was young and they could not foresee any kind of tragedy  like this happening. 

Shannon was truly a one of a kind. She had an incredible soul, a giving nature, and her good energy would fill a room with pure LOVE. Shannon always had a smile on her face no matter what she was going through. Personally, I will never forget the first time I had the pleasure of meeting her. She didn't even know me however, she walked up to me and gave me a hug that you would normally expect from a beloved friend or someone you have known all your life. Wherever she went she graced others with a beautiful spirit, unique nature of spreading love and kindness.

When she was alive she deserved the best and now in death she needs to be celebrated for all the love she gave to others.

My family would greatly appreciate it if you could dig deep into your hearts as well as your pockets to help Donnie cremate Shannon, provide her with a beautiful memorial, and allow him the opportunity to say good-bye to the love of his life so he can more forward with the healing process. 

Shannon may be physically gone from this earth but she will NEVER be forgotten.

Painfully for my cousin, normal ceases to exist. He wasn't ready to say goodbye to his soulmate. We being the humans we are would hope most can sympathize as well as empathize with that form of pain.

Personally, I am conscious of the fact that he needs this memorial sooner rather than later so his heart ,mind, and soul can begin the mending process. With that being said, I think I am more aware of this compared to others surrounding him at this time because they are viewing his grief methods/habits of coping as harmful. Yes, that can be true at times but in this case no. For example, if he goes into uncontrollably bounts of crying, by ALL means let him scream and cry it out. From my experience when someone faces the tragic loss of the one they chose to love unconditionally every single day through sunshine and storms, they should be free to express each emotion that is brought to the light. Due to that fact that it helps them heal.( Of course as a loved one or friend it is wise to observe overly destructive behavior). On the other hand, simply show up with compassion in your heart as well as an unwavering listening ear, as well as a mindful outlook on the process of grieving. Chalk it up to the mere fact that we all learn knowledge of the world arounds us in many different ways and so far humanity has accepted that so why have some individuals neglected the fact that grief is also a challenge that can take on various journeys before reaching the destination of a healed heart.

In conclusion, I have a deep passion for change on this subject.

In my opinion, phrases such as: "Omg Joey it has been months since your girlfriend's accident, why can't you just let go?"

Instead, speak life into the survivor who has courage to face the darkness of death. Saying, "Victoria I am proud of you for the progress your making to move forward yet still old your loved one dear to your heart."

Grief is painful all on its own, one can only hope that the collective show more compassion, practice patience, and lend a genuine shoulder to cry on.