Kids Say the Darndest Things
Kids Say the Darndest Things

Blow Hard, Bud!

by Kat Peirce 2 years ago in children

Adventures and Times of a Boy Mom

Blow Hard, Bud!

Being a mom is never an easy thing. You often feel as if you have failed in some way, question, and doubt yourself. Those feelings only get worse when you live not only with anxiety but with kids who are hyperactive as well.

I am a stay at home mom of two beautiful boys, three years and one and a half years. These two often make me not only question myself, my sanity, and my parenting. Not only are they hyper, but they are smart as whips. They know the words to songs, as well as movies. They can get themselves into a number of situations, and most times get themselves out of those same situations. Yesterday was no different... We are currently looking into preschools for my oldest. He has been asking for months and was devastated when I couldn't find a school for him. Apparently there are schools out there that start mid-year for kids like Will, who has a birthday after the normal cut-off date. There is only one school in our area that offers it, so we set off to see it as soon as registration opened.

The whole ride there was quiet with some small talk between the boys to myself. We even sang a little. They ate their kid morning snacks as we continued on our little outing. It wasn't until Will said, "Mommy, ew, my apple!" My mom senses flared... Now, I thought maybe he had dropped it or something had gotten on it. My worst immediate thought was it was rotten in the middle and I didn't know it. I started looking for a place to pull over, but figured it wasn't serious and told him just to hold off until we found a place. The whole time he spoke to me, or rather rambled on the way three-year-olds who can't speak too clearly do. I spotted a pull-off after a minute or so, and at that exact moment he says... "Mommy, my nose..."

I look back and can't see anything, whip into a some stranger's driveway, go around the car, open the door, and say, "What happened?"

A smile appears on his face and he tips his head back while saying, "Apple in my nose!" And of course, he's a toddler, so he laughs because apparently it's funny.

With that, I brace myself, think I don't have time or money for a doctor's visit, then look in his nose. A little dark and hard to see, but way back in his nose is a piece of white. It's hard to see with how far back it is, but sure enough he had bitten a piece of apple off and shoved it in his nose. Why a toddler would be driven the shove a piece of Apple in his nose is beyond me, but he did, and he continues to giggle at his task that he had completed. I know that either I am going to need tweezers, which I don't have, to visit the doctors which I can't pay for, or my last option... Blow it out...

He had stopped giggling at this point, I say a little prayer that hopefully the Lord can step in, and I put my finger over his other nostril pinching off that side. I looked him sternly in the face and said, "Bubba, what you did was really bad and hopefully we can work together to get it out. What I need you to do now is blow really hard...Blow again, bub...and again..." On the fourth try, that piece of slimy white apple came shooting out of his nose at rocket speeds! He then laughs hilariously at this little clump of boogie covered apple while I thank the Lord that I didn't have another bill to add to my budget this month. Clean that little boy up, look him over, and then start dying of laughter myself!

There are times throughout our days where they do something like paint the couch with marshmallow fluff, strip down and stand in the bay window while our neighbors pass, suddenly pull their pants down, and pee in the yard while everyone is watching, or randomly shove apples up their noses... These are times I want to be mad, angry, or upset, but all I can do is laugh! They are 100% my kids and show it all the time. The things they do may upset me at first, but once the anger passes it will be funny. If that anger can pass more quickly, then I can handle the situation better or even be able to laugh with my kids about the whole thing rather than yell at them. After all, they are children; they are going to do things that drive you bonkers, but the sooner you get through the frustration and anger or upset-ness, the sooner you can laugh with the toddler as he giggles with a big smile on his face thinking it's the funniest thing in the world.

children
Kat Peirce
Kat Peirce
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