Blended by Pixie Dust

“There’s a great big beautiful tomorrow…”

Disney’s Carousel of Progress

Disneyland has been the backdrop for many happy memories, and raising my family in Southern California allowed us to claim our fair share. Cinderella declared to my daughter on her sixth birthday that it was her “two‑hand birthday” as we entered the park. Donald Duck once fawned over my newborn son and then tried to get his mom to stop yelling in excitement because she had heard him talk. For months, my son insisted on standing against the height‑check sign every visit, hoping he had grown enough in the past couple of weeks to ride the attractions his big sister could enjoy, but he could not.

The Happiest Place on Earth took on even more significance as my marriage began to fall apart. The kids and I made weekly pilgrimages to escape the turmoil at home and build new memories within our evolving family unit. We even made friends with other visitors from an online community of fellow enthusiasts. We dreaded the days we were blacked out from our annual passes.

Prior to our meeting, Nicole had never brought her kids to Disneyland. Upon learning this fact on our first date, I awkwardly joked that this was a type of child abuse. Still, I understood that it was a challenge to take a set of young triplets out of the house, especially to a crowded theme park. Add the fact that two of the girls were autistic to the mix, and a place designed to overwhelm the senses didn’t seem like the safest bet for a successful family outing.

Coincidentally, their first visit had already been planned and took place shortly after we met. Nicole braved the park with an army of support. The holiday card photo commemorating the event makes it clear I wasn’t there. Children on leashes would never have happened on my watch.

As our families began to blend, it was not long before we planned a joint trip to the park. We eventually bought annual passes for the entire group, and these trips became regular occurrences. We began building memories for our budding family.

My favorite early memory was an attempted visit to the "It’s Tough to Be a Bug" attraction. My teenage daughter always refused to see the show and immediately took her place at the exit. One of the girls with autism had an issue with the enclosed space and had to be taken out before the movie even started. Her sister was the next to be escorted out because she couldn’t handle the 3D effects. The remaining triplet left in tears once the bad guys took over the action. That left my son, who decided it was ridiculous to be the only family member still inside, so he joined everyone else at the exit.

For our family, this episode proved to be the exception, as autism was not usually a barrier to the park. There were challenges, but for the most part, it was a place where the children thrived. The child with limited speech abilities would drag me from ride to ride and tell me “castle” when I dawdled too long on Main Street on the way into the park. Her sister would drive the rest of us crazy with her repeated requests for “wanna go to Disneyland?” during the week.

The park was also a place where I got to watch my kids grow into their roles as siblings in a larger family. My son, who was now suddenly no longer the youngest, had to be coaxed away from being the Mother Hen; Disneyland was a place to explore, not to be herded. My daughter displayed patience that she had not always had for her brother as she guided the girls through their fears and emotional ups and downs.

Once my divorce date was finalized, Nicole and I started talking about our wedding plans. Given the role Disneyland had played in our family, it seemed like the obvious place, but it was also out of our budget. Then we started thinking outside the box.

Corporate Disney does not like people not paying for their official services, so we had to work completely under their radar. Instead of formal wedding attire, we arrived at the park in t-shirts emblazoned with the dwarf who most closely resembled our individual personalities. We decided that Tom Sawyer Island was the most inconspicuous place in the park and had the added benefit that security couldn’t easily reach us. We assembled on the island with our closest friends and relatives, waited for security to pass (making sure adoring pre‑teen girls didn’t overwhelm Jack Sparrow), and exchanged our vows:

Once upon a time,

somewhere online,

a man and a woman met,

and soon after they fell in love.

But like most tales of love,

that wasn't enough.

For today is not about two people,

but seven dwarfs coming together as one family.

Becca, Jessie, Sydney, Morgan, and Zoey,

You are important members of this ceremony

and the magic we are creating today.

Without Things 1 through 5,

this would not be an e‑ticket ride.

Now Carl repeat after me:

I, Carl, take you, Nicole, to be my wife,

my partner in life and my one true love.

I will be yours in times of sorrow and times of joy,

in times of sickness and times of health,

in times of failure and times of triumph.

Carl, do you promise to cherish and respect her,

to laugh at her and cry with her,

to communicate your feelings and needs with her,

to comfort and encourage her,

for as long as you both shall live?

I do.

Now Carl, place the ring on Nicole's finger and repeat after me:

Let this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and your children.

I am honored to call you my wife.

(Credit to T. J. Ferreira for the awesome wedding vows that I live by every day.)

Unfortunately, we were eventually priced out of the Annual Passes, and the time between visits began to grow. When passing the exit in the car, my daughter would still ask, “wanna go to Disneyland?” and we knew there were still memories waiting to be made.

Eighteen years ago today, we created the most life‑changing of my Disney memories. We no longer even live in the same state as the Magic Kingdom, but a piece of our hearts will always be there. A few months before our move, we had the opportunity to visit with four of the five kids and our first grandson. A blue lightsaber revealed that he would soon be joined by a brother. There are still more memories waiting for this family at the Happiest Place on Earth.