Being a Young Mom

Being a young mom isn't the easiest thing you could think of. I had my son when I was 19. Going to all those doctors appointments, hearing all the big words all the doctors had to say—it was really scary! I'm here to tell you, if you're young like I was, you can do it. It is possible to be a young mother; it's just harder than if you were actually prepared.

I didn't have a job. I still can't drive. I was living with my boyfriend, who turned out to be abusive. My son and I have definitely had a rocky start to our lives. Let me tell you a little bit about it.

I was 17 and met this man I thought was the love of my life. We ended up dating and after a few short months, I moved in with him. I was having a lot of problems at home and just needed to get away. I couldn't be there anymore. I didn't understand sex or any of the things about it. I didn't understand what condoms were. I didn't know about birth control. I let this man tell me no condoms fit him and we had sex unsafely many times. Of course I was bound to get pregnant.

We were at a Christmas party at my grandmother's and I wasn't feeling well. The rest of that month and almost all of January, I thought I had a really bad cold. I finally went to the doctor and she asked me if I could be pregnant. I told her no. We decided to take a blood test anyway, just to be sure. Low and behold, she called me the next day with her congratulations. All I said was thank you, asked for a recommendation for an OB-GYN, and we hung up the phone. I hit the floor, sobbing and screaming. I called my mom. She convinced me to call my sister and move out of my boyfriend's house. My sister let me in. Everything was fine, and I got my first job as a temporary secretary at a church. I got my permit for the second time and everything was looking up. Then, I made the worst mistake of my life.

I went back to my ex. I stayed for way too long in a very toxic relationship. I'll go into detail about that in another post if anyone wants to hear about it. I stayed until my son was about a year-and-a-half.

His first birthday went really well. Planning it was definitely hard since I wanted to invite my whole family (over 80 people) to this party. It took a month or so of planning and my mom and I made all the food a day ahead of time. That party wouldn't have been such a success if my family hadn't have stepped in and helped. I love them for that.

After I left my ex a second time, we ended up with an ex friend of mine. That didn't last very long and now we're somewhere much better. Pretty soon, we're even getting our own house!

Being young and having to walk around the store or the mall with a child can be hard. People look at you weird; sometimes you get asked if your child is your brother or sister. You get put into situations where you have to stay home instead of go to that party because you can't find a baby sitter. Some girls have to quit school because the school won't let them be there and be pregnant. Then those girls can't find sitters so they end up home schooled or getting their GED's. Sitting at home with a crying baby all the time definitely isn't an easy job. I can tell you this though. If you're in the position that you're going to end up being a young mom, it is worth all the sideways looks and mean comments.

This journey has had a very rough start but I'm proud to say I'm headed in the right direction and my son is growing up beautifully. He's going to school, I have a job, and I'm working on driving. I graduated. It might be a slow start, but we're finally getting somewhere.