Anxiety of our generation

Perhaps it's a bit exaggerated to generalize with "our generation." After all, when I think about this topic, the scope of "our generation" within my understanding is only limited to me and my single friends. Most of the people around me are already married and have children, so they don't fall into this category. Maybe a more appropriate title would be "Anxiety of Me and My Single Friends." But then again, maybe a title like that would attract more exposure?

Yesterday, I made up my mind to find a job. I compromised on the condition of having weekends off and found an interview scheduled for Monday. If I do some research in advance, I have a good chance of doing well in the interview. I still have confidence in that.

However, laziness and the condition of having only one day off per week make me feel passive and just willing to go with the flow. In simple terms, if I haven't done enough research on the company before the interview and they still consider hiring me under such circumstances, then I would accept the job offer!

To be honest, this kind of thinking is a bit dangerous. So, tomorrow I will do some basic preparation and send out applications to a few more companies. Who knows, maybe I will come across a company that is close to home and offers weekends off.

It seems like the Monday interview has somewhat relieved the anxiety I've been feeling since becoming unemployed. In the afternoon, I indulged myself and bought a movie ticket to watch a film alone.

This movie is one that I've been wanting to see recently, partly because of the extensive promotion on a certain social media platform. However, due to excessive exposure on the internet, I was able to guess the murderer and main plotline with a high degree of certainty (thanks to the over-promotion). While watching the film, I even had the urge to fall asleep or take out my phone to read a novel.

After the movie, I had numerous mosquito bites on my legs and a belly full of water (yes, that theater had mosquitoes, the blood-sucking type). I thought about filing a complaint against the theater, but when I saw the employees in their uniforms, who all seemed very young (probably summer interns), I lost the desire to complain. Overall, it was a good movie, but excessive exposure is not ideal for suspenseful films.

On my way back home after the movie, my friend sent me a message saying she was feeling emotional. Over the past two years, both she and I have frequently experienced various emotional struggles, which means we can only confide in each other. After all, we are both single and wandering souls.

This time, her emotions were triggered by a customer who changed their mind about wanting a white wardrobe after she had already customized it accordingly. The customer claimed it was her mistake and that she misunderstood their requirements about the color. Since there was no chat evidence to prove otherwise, she had to bear this bitterness alone.

The frustrations of work combined with the lack of new clients recently have caused her to doubt herself again. She constantly feels that her peers are earning a minimum annual income of 200,000 yuan, while she is still stuck at 100,000 yuan and burdened with a mortgage. Moreover, the return on investment in the company she invested in is uncertain. She feels like a failure.

From my perspective, I can easily reassure her and say it's okay, take it slow. But I know that if I were in her position, I wouldn't want to hear such words. After all, without any practical advice, it's just empty talk. However, after two years, I truly don't know how to comfort her anymore, just like how she sometimes doesn't know how to comfort me. So, I can only join her in venting our frustrations about the client and criticizing the major shareholder of her company.

When I got home, she told me that she wanted to become emotionally stable. I smiled and thought, who wouldn't want that? I've already done a great job comforting her. She said I have a stronger inner self, but what strength? True strength is being fearless against others' words. Even now, I'm still afraid to chat with my own relatives because I fear being asked about how to end my single status.

So, how many people can truly achieve emotional stability? I think other than those who have dedicated themselves to a religious life, there are very few people in the real world who can achieve emotional stability. Perhaps, we can only try to control ourselves a little bit when we become aware that our emotions are unstable.