An Open Letter to my Son (Part ll)

Dear Samuel,

So much has changed in our lives since my last letter. We have both loved and lost, we have experienced a lot of life together. We have grown up and grown closer; secretly, I depend on you as much as you depend on me. Each day, I depend on the fact that you will wake up and be a day older, with a new lesson to learn. That may not seem like much against the backdrop of what you depend on me for, but it's something that is a monumental responsibility that I take very seriously.

At this point in your life, I have failed you on more occasions than I care to mention. Some of these are failures you have realized, some you have not but may one day, and some I hope that you never know about. At this point in your life, you're able to acknowledge and realize that mommy isn't perfect. However, no one is, and I do the best I can every day, and that is something that I hope that you notice.

At this time in your life, I am trying to teach you how to do things and how to practice basic human decency. I hope and pray that these lessons you're learning now and the foundation that we're building will help you grow into a healthy, happy, prepared, benevolent, and stable human being.

My hopes and dreams for your life are many. However, they aren't necessarily focused on what you do for a living, what kind of house or car you have, or how much money you make. My hopes and dreams for your life are that you become a person who is virtuous. I hope that you become a person who believes in doing the right thing because it is the right thing to do, someone full of integrity and honor, that not only proclaims it but shows it in your life and in your actions. I want you to love fully, purely, and authentically. I want you to give respect and to be someone who is respectable. I want you to have manners, to be brave, to do the hard things with all the heart, passion, and excellence you can muster.

I want you to find balance and peace, to be sure of your choices, and confident in your actions and decisions. I hope that when you mess up, make mistakes, or bad decisions that I have given you the necessary tools to do your very best to right your wrongs. I hope that you can still find happiness and hope on your very worst days, and that you have a solid group of friends and family who will encourage you and help you. I hope your relationships with others are healthy and rewarding for all parties involved.

I hope that you still love your mommy and come visit when you can. I hope that you still let me help you and guide you as you need it. I want you to be able to be close to your family, who loves you very much. Go visit your grandparents too, and your cousins, aunts, and uncles. Make time for what is important for those who are important.

I love you son, and I am so proud of the foundation we are building.