An Open Letter to My So-Called ‘Parents’
Where being completely silent is no longer an option
Dear So-Called “Parents”:
It’s been almost 10 years since I’ve last seen the both of you. I don’t call you “mom” and “dad” anymore, because when I was younger and reached adulthood, you hardly had anything positive to say about me and use my siblings to turn against me whenever I did something wrong. I think that’s one of the most despicable things you could ever do towards your own child. On top of that, you tell your friends and others lies about me that weren’t true. You would constantly berate and talk down to me. Not only that, but completely lowered my self-confidence. My self-confidence is still low today, because if you had treated me with love and respect more, I wouldn’t be feeling like this right now. To me, y’all were bullying me. The both of you forced me out of my hometown and Texas in general: the place where I grew up for most of my life and y’all call yourselves parents? You took my friends away from me and I’ll never forgive you. I’ve had great friends and teachers who liked me.
How can you call me your son when you have hurt me emotionally and physically since I was a kid? How can you claim that you love me when y’all have threatened me on numerous occasions? When was I ever your son when you have done these horrible things to me? Yes, I’ve done some things to make you mad back then. However, as adults, you have to take personal responsibility for your actions when you’re in the wrong. That’s part of being an adult. To this day, I’ve yet to receive a sincere apology from either one of you. It’s unlikely that I won’t get it, because nothing is ever your fault. You blame other people for your own problems and also take your frustrations on them, including me. That’s something I don’t respect about y’all at all. You coming from another country is not an excuse to treat your oldest child or any of your other children like crap. My siblings and I were always taught to respect the both of you and other people, yet you didn’t respect us.
In case you didn’t know, not that you care, I’ve been out of the closet for almost 10 years. Yes, I’m an openly gay man and not ashamed of being myself. I wanted to come out to you back in 2012, but I already knew that the both of you would disown me anyway. You never let me be myself when I was a kid and favored my siblings over me. I’m now surrounded by people who actually love, support, and accepts me unconditionally: something that I hardly received in my childhood. Your job as parents was to protect me, not trying to harm me. You’ve lost all rights as parents and hopefully one day, y’all would look back and realize the hurt you’ve inflicted towards me all of those years. In the last several years, I’ve battled depression, anxiety, and tried to take my own life on numerous occasions. It was because of the trauma I’ve experienced in my youth and into adulthood.
I’ve been silent for so long and I’m not going to be quiet anymore. I’m not going to take down this open letter to the both of you, either. I’ve taken so much verbal abuse from the both of you for numerous years and now, I’m a lot stronger than you think. You don’t have to approve of me being gay, but I hope that someday, you would humble yourself and become nicer people. Let my open letter be a lesson to the both of you. I may not be perfect, but I’m doing my best to get through this thing called life. Maybe one of these days, we will reconcile and reconnect, but I doubt that’ll happen anytime soon. For your information, I do have a life, so please stop with that false and ridiculous narrative. I’m living my best life and not letting anything or anyone stand in my way. I don’t care if y’all or anyone else never speak to me again. I wanted to address you in this letter one more time to express how disappointed I am with the both of you. You’re no longer the baggage that I’m carrying. I’m done being bullied and chastised by the both of you. I’m going to find a great man who loves me, marry him, and live happily ever after. I plan on changing my last name to distance myself away from you even further.
I could care less about what you think of me now. I’ve since lost all respect for you. I’m going to continue being around positive people who appreciate me. You can call me every name in the book, but I’m in a much better place now. I’m going to stand tall and do amazing things for others.
The son who will never respect you again