An Open Letter to My Girlfriend’s Mom.

This is a thank you meant for you...

Thank you for showing me the immensity and possibilities that another mother could only have in all the ways that you didn’t even know you did but have.

Thank you for being the showing me the maternal love that a part of me has always felt a void of but have wanted. Thank you for being everything that I've always hoped for and wanted but never had in my own.

Thank you for showing me. Because even though everyone may deserve it and it comes natural for you being a mom as you are, everyone doesn't get that. And that's why I appreciate you more than you could ever know and everything you do. Noticing more and it mattering more in all the best ways.

Thank you for showing me that mom's like you exist and for sharing, showing that love to me as well. Everyone deserve to have a mom like you. And I'm so lucky to get to know you and have you be a mom to me in my life.

I believe that we meet everyone for a reason and in the time that we are meant to. We don't get to always pick who start with but it doesn't mean that the right people won't end up in your life. Life knew what it was doing when I met your daughter and when she let me meet the most important person in her life. Allowing me through her to have the type of relationship with you that I needed and that I would never get but always wanted with my own mom. Allowing me to have a deeper appreciation for a mom like you because of the way I was raised.

Thank you for showing me...

I could freeze spinach. That I should buy chicken in bulk and split it into smaller portions in bags and freeze them. A really cool soap dispenser. All of the things I never knew existed that you keep in your pantry. A really cool water filtration system. That tikki marsala is indeed very different than normal marsala. What a normal, healthy family dynamic looks like between grown kids and their parents. That I can cook really yummy meals all gluten free as I haven't been challenged to do that before.

Thank you for...

Letting me organize your pantry and fridge even if it only stayed that way for a second. Teaching me about so many cool foods, spices, and other things that I never even knew existed. Letting me cook for you. For all the amazing meals you have cooked for me. Sharing your alcohol with me. Embracing my white claw love.

Letting me share the things that are happening in my life with you and caring. Talking about them with me and being there for me. Letting me joke around with you. Not ever judging or questioning me. Being open to trying new things. Letting me be myself without having to ever worry about anything.

For listening to ideas I have and embracing them. For supporting my unconventional ideas and ways of being effective when moving or doing things. For always taking my jokes like a champ. For texting me like a normal person, I appreciate that more than you know. For never trying to force anything onto me whether theology, ideals, or even food. For entertaining my randomness, puns, and dorky moments.

For playing along with my jokes and when I make you repeat yourself multiple times for fun. For all the treasures you let me have when you were moving. For all the nights that you let me join your family and come over to your house.

For talking about Vitamixes, spices, and bougie espresso machines with me. For listening to my music and asking me to play music sometimes. For being so open to new things and new experiences. Whether it was hammocking or driving all over the place. For not watching the news whenever I came over. For listening to a variety of music with cuss words as a norm. For drinking and cussing as a normal thing with family.

Little things that happened that wouldn't seem like big deals to you and are normal but to someone who grew up in my family weren't. You've helped me to reconstruct my ideals of normalcy and what a healthy family dynamic looks like. Taking it all in, always enjoying every moment. Learning and living.

Letting me kidnap you and just going for the ride. Having such a happy go lucky and bubbly personality and perspective to life. All of our adventures. All the time we spent together.

For all the little moments when you got super excited about things like chacuterie utensils and tiny bowls. For all the times that your inner kid comes out to play along with the goofiness of all your kids. For all the laughs and all the smiles.

For letting us spend that together and for actually trying to get to know me for me. For treating me like your family. For never making me feel like I was a stranger or didn't belong. For making me feel like I was valued when spending time with you in what I said.

For letting me join you on all of the holidays I have been able to since I’ve known you. For your hospitable spirit and warm smiles. For your silliness and giggly free spiritedness. For noticing all the small little details in things. For your appreciation of food and mixology curiosity. For always being open to trying whatever and eager to learn the things I may have wanted to share and teach.

For raising your children especially your daughter the way that you did with all of the qualities that you exude and radiate so vibrantly.

You're a light of love in this world and raised them to be lights as well allowing them to be free to find what lights them up but always rooted in free love.

Thank you for.

Kindness. Compassion. Care. Love. Freedom. Family. Realness. Support. All unconditional, without judgment, and from the purest place in your heart, soul, and mind. All things that I have never experience from my own family in the way that you and your family show to each other.

Seeing it from the outside, not being raised in that and around that is something that always just leaves me in awe because I get to be a part of it now but I also know how special and rare that is, how beautiful it is.

For being real with me and always letting me talk to you about everything. For all the kindness you’ve shown me through the things you’ve said and done that have been towards me or to simply those around me and for your daughter. Your actions and words speak wonders and so loudly to the person you are and the depths of the care, kindness, love, and compassion that you have in your heart.

That is something I have only been able to see more and more of as time as gone by and I have gotten to known you better and spend more time with you. You've expanded what I thought possible as normal expectations from family and parents to what is possible to make from scratch in the kitchen.

For standing up for what you believe in and standing strong but not ever letting that lead to you hating anyone else or judging them but staying rooted in love and acceptance.

For showing me more love and support in the ways that I have needed it and that I haven’t felt in a maternal way for a very long time and in all honestly don’t think I could ever expect from my own. In just the little over half a year that I have known you, thank you for showing me things that I never saw, knew about, or felt in the ways that you have.

Thank you for welcoming me in from day one even before day one with such warmth and open arms. Thank you for always giving the best hugs.

Thank you for being the person you are. For being such a strong woman and mother. For knowing and showing what unconditional love means. For never waivering in who you are and what you deserve. For always putting family above all else. For only ever wanting what is best for your kids but never confusing that with what you might think or want for them. For letting me get to know you in the time I've known you. For being such an incredible super mom to your kids. For showing me that moms like you exist and opening my eyes to so much more that I never got to experience or knew were possible. For being the lionness of your family always leading and protecting them.

So thank you for being my girlfriend's mom.

Thank you for being the mom in my life that I've always hoped to find.