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Am I the Parent I Taught Others Not to Be?

I've got a certificate in parenting, but am I on the right path?

By Reiner MacPhailPublished 6 years ago 2 min read
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Our beautiful family! 

My husband and I have been together for 14 years. In 2013, we got married and celebrated our love ❤️ for one another. We put in an application for adoption one year after we got married in 2014. We always knew it was the best choice for us to start our own family, as we knew we both wanted children. We finally got the call we had been waiting for on Aug 1st 2017. We had been matched with a sibling group, two boys 9 months old and 21 months. We were overjoyed and a little overwhelmed, to say the least. We had been waiting for what seemed for ever...and in just a short few weeks we would be parents, if we decided to move forward. We weren't aloud to tell anyone, as we didn't want to get anyone's hopes up. We still had to learn about the brothers and any health issues they maybe diagnosed with. We would also not be able to see a picture of the boys until we said yes, that we would like to go ahead with the adoption.

And as every parent probably thinks even with their biological children, (what if they're ugly?) thankfully that wasn't the case. And that thought didn't stay in my head long, after hearing all about their stories. We had so much to get ready and collect in such a short time. Two bedrooms, cribs, toys, change tables, and everything else that goes with having two children under the age of 2 years old. But we weren't alone, we had so much family/friends support. They were there day after day! And even hosted us an adoption shower. We met the boys for two weeks before they finally moved home with us.

My husband was home with me for the first week, then the honeymoon phase was over. Behaviours began with my older boy, pulling hair, pinching, hitting etc. He would target his younger brother and our cat and dog. I was in the early childhood field for 6 years, but nothing prepared me for this! They were my children at the end of the day, I couldn't just send them home with their parents, like I was so used to. I tried things I was taught, redirecting.... didn't work! Talking in a calm and stern voice, still not working. What now? I was turning to things that I always told other parents didn't work, time outs, counting from 1-5 (when I get to 5 you loose something special or go to your crib for a timeout). I guess I never realized the struggles parents face day to day. When children are with us at daycare they at a certain way. But at home it's a whole different story, I just want to say kudos to all parents! You are amazing at what you do; self-doubt is normal, I do it everyday.

adoption
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About the Creator

Reiner MacPhail

I have anxiety and I love chickens! This is me in a nut shell. I'm 32 years old, with two young children and husband I work as an early childhood educator, and I have a passion for fashion and interior design. I live on a small Island PEI.

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