A Whole New Christmas
Savoring, Remembering & Celebrating During Covid19
CHRISTMAS 2020 may be the loneliest day we've experienced in our lifetimes. Gone is the grandeur of the traditions and customs that make us feel the love and cheer this special day brings with it because of covid-19. And yet there is hope. The world was bleak and dark and a lot alike in uncertainty before and time and time again, we are reminded we all need our mothers just like the world needed redemption and a chance for a better, brighter future.
Because of love, Christmas just feels right. I remember the first Christmas after losing my own mother to breast cancer. I was only 14. Try as I might to remember our last Christmas together, I simply cannot. I do however hold on to the memories I do recall; from our first Christmas on Woody Drive where mom didn't have time to wrap our gifts because of the hustle and bustle of moving and I received a big, black and beautiful bean bag chair. I yelped with glee partly because I had seen the gift by opening the trunk of our Nissan Quest van way too early.
My three sisters and me often continued our tradition of slightly tearing a bit of the wrapping paper to see what's inside and then proceeding to put the present at the back of the tree until at last there was no room to do so. Imagine a tree surrounded by gifts, mostly perched somehow mysteriously against the wall under the watchful eye of our African American angel atop the tree-- her gold and olive green dress flowing as regally as her outstretched wings.
Mom passed November 1st and the following Christmas was beyond difficult. To assuage some of the grief, I received every single thing I wanted; a Sony playstation 2, a basketball and more books that I could ask for. Because of the change in our living situation, my sisters and I no longer lived together. However, by going to their grandfather's house, Christmas felt somewhat normal. We needed to wake up together on Christmas morning in order to obscure the pain of our newly wrapped grief.
In the face of such loss, where hope seems as distant as Pluto and equally as far away from the sun, it becomes important to reminisce on the Christmas memories you hold dear. That is my advice as we cannot spend today with those we love because of the tragedy of the pandemic we are facing. Memories like Christmas day visits to Yazoo City to visit Aunt Becca and eating until our stomachs were too heavy to lift. Or memories like my grandfather's stern but loving "Merry Christmas" on that day along with the crisp one-hundred dollar bills he handed out with it.
"... kindness isn't that far off."
One memory and a testament to my mother's kindness is the time we were at the house of the lady who pressed my three sisters' hair. Mom, ever observant as she was, noticed there weren't many gifts under the tree. The sweet, older lady whose name I cannot recall, had small children living with her. There should've been more gifts under that tree. Mom left and returned with gifts that she'd wrapped. Tears flowed and hearts were opened that day. It was a small miracle and an example to how kindness isn't that far off.
I miss the Christmas programs at church and the singing of Christmas songs like "Children Go Where I Send Thee".
I miss the freedom to go from house to house and spend time with family and exchange gifts.
I miss mom, even still some 18 years later.
"We are more than three-fifth human beings."
This Christmas is like nothing we've seen before. From a President who has sown such hatred and discord to a society where black people still have to remind others of our humanity and how we are more than three-fifth human beings. We have a right to the America that was built on our backs. Stolen land, stolen people. We don't like to think about our dark history and the truths that make us uncomfortable, but covid-19 is forcing us to do just that --- a reckoning and a gift no less.
We need the hard thing as much as or maybe even more than the soft and yielding thing. Although we physically cannot be together this year , we can still let the love and light in. We don't have to give in to loneliness. We can reach out and up and into the sun and the warmth of each other.
Happy Holidays to you, my friend. If you enjoyed reading this article, share it with a friend or loved one and feel free to tip if you so choose.
About the Creator
Jehrod Rose Alain
Jehrod Rose Alain is a writer seeking to find meaning through poetry, yoga, kindness, mindfulness and the virtues of love. Based in Jackson, MS, he can often be found at his favorite coffee shops with a good book and a cappuccino.
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