5 Things I Learnt as a First-Time Mum

I became a mum at 17, which came with hardships of its own, and my boyfriend (now husband) and I were excited to become parents. Nappies and no sleep are just the start, but it is an adventure.

1. It's okay not to be the perfect parent.

When you have a baby, there are going to be things you haven't done before and things you've only seen other people do. You're allowed to ask for help with these things.

Because my son was at nursery and I lived with my mum for the first few months of his life, I had help. When he turned six months old, the nursery staff helped me with what foods to start with when weaning him. I really appreciated that and it put my mind at ease.

2. Every child is different

At 2 years old, my son was only saying seven or eight clear words and phrases, but I was seeing kids his age talking in sentences and even having conversations. I was worried. His doctors noted it. My health visitor was the one to tell me it was perfectly normal at this stage. She would only be worried if he was still struggling at school age.

Kids will do what they want when they want when it comes to development.

3. You'll be judged no matter what

Judgmental mums are real. They'll say: you're feeding them wrong, you're dressing them wrong, you're raising them wrong. In my opinion, as long as you're not doing anything that mentally or physically harms your child or endangers them, you're perfectly fine.

As a teen mum, I was painted with every stereotype imaginable. His dad isn't a deadbeat and we love each other a lot, hence him becoming my husband. I had a bit of help from the government in the beginning, but after about a year, I didn't receive a penny. My education didn't end with the birth of my son. I went to university after college with no time off, and I paid my way. Despite all of this, I was still perceived as a someone I was not.

4. Do what is best for you

During pregnancy and after birth, "BREAST IS BEST" will practically be screamed at you. In a lot of cases, it's not. Some mothers can't, some babies don't, and some don't want to, but that's okay.

I started off breastfeeding, but after six weeks, I gave up. I was miserable. I was sick and tired of being sore, having to sleep on a towel and being the only one that could get up to feed him at night. I switched him to formula, but I kept seeing these mums that had fed their babies to one or two years old. It made me feel guilty. It was the best thing for me at the time though.

5. Enjoy the newborn stage

Honestly. My son slept for most of the day, wasn't fussy, didn't go anywhere, but I still couldn't help wishing to see him sit up and crawl and walk. At 2 years old, I can barely keep up with him, and I miss being able to hold him in my arms comfortably. I struggle to do that with all 4 stone of him.

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Overall, being a parent for a mum or dad is a journey through ups and downs. Every parent I've ever spoken to has never said they regret keeping their kid(s). Kids can be horrible people sometimes, but somehow, we still love them unconditionally.

X Jord X