WHY I TEACH-Part 9: Integrity

I stood by my desk and greeted my students. Day two and they came in smiling, laughing, joking.

“Alright,” I began, “Rule number one?”

“Bathroom!”

“Rule number two?”

“Raising hands!”

“Rule number three?”

“Food!”

“Rule number four?”

“Gum!”

At this point, the wavy-haired boy, Terrance, stood and went to get a mint from the oversized drink container. I watched him toss the wrapper into the trash as he made his way back to his desk.

“What do you think rule number five is?”

Hand shot up, mouths stayed closed.

I picked a couple of students. “Cheating? Phones?”

I hit the space bar and a picture of the American Flag with the words National Anthem appeared.

“Rule number five is the National Anthem. Yes, I know this is first period and the chances are rare that the school day will end during this period, but it does happen. And when it happens, they will play the National Anthem before they dismiss us.”

“How do you stand for the National Anthem?”

Several kids tossed out answers like “at attention” and “with your hand on your heart”.

I hit the space bar and the presentation flashed a list of recommendations.

“According to this list, you can put your hand at your heart, hands by your side, three-finger Boy Scout or Girl Scout salute. You may not, however, do this:”

I put my hand to my heart, then down to my side, then back to my heart, Boy Scout salute, then back to my heart.

“You have to pick one and stick with it. And when does the National Anthem end? Is it when they sing, ‘Land of the Brave’?” I picked up the nearest backpack and headed toward the hallway, “Home of the free???”

I returned to the front of the room and placed the backpack back on the desk. “Or do you hold it for three more seconds and wait for the song to end?”

“Wait!”

“Now just to clarify, I don’t care how you feel about this nation, but that flag—men and women have died for that flag, given everything for that flag—deserves respect from everyone in this classroom. Understand?”

Nods.

“So write it down, rule number five is National Anthem.”

I hit the spacebar, a pile of Lego bricks appeared.

I went to my closet of an office, retrieved a large clear plastic bin full of Lego bricks, and set it on my desk.

“We all have bad days. We all have days when we just can’t. For those days, I have Lego.”

“What? Really?” rang out.

“Now, let me explain. You will be responsible for any work you do not do when you need a break. Building with Lego doesn’t excuse you from work. You must build at your desk, quietly, and do not disturb the people around you. And you must make sure all the bricks end up back in the box. Why?”

Terrance raised his hand. “Because there’s nothing worse than stepping on a Lego.”

“Because there is nothing worse than stepping on a Lego,” I repeated.

“Can I play with them now,” he asked.

“After you take the test on the rules, you can.”

I hit the spacebar, Integrity appeared.

I heard several groans and shifting in chairs.

“I’d like to talk to you about integrity. My integrity, not yours.”

All eyes focused on me. I wasn’t going to give them a lecture on what they should do or how they should act.

I hit the spacebar to reveal my six points of integrity.

Integrity feels best:

1. Even when it makes my life harder.
2. Even when it allows others an unfair advantage.
3. Even when it requires uncomfortable conversations.
4. Even when it means I won’t fit in.
5. Even when no one else will know the difference.
6. Even when it requires me to treat others better than they’ve treated me.

“First, even when it makes my life harder. If you need something, and it is within my power to provide it, I’ll do it. Even if it makes my life harder.”

“Second, even when it allows others an unfair advantage. Last year, I had a kid who didn’t really like to work. In fact, he was determined to just fail and not graduate. I had five assignments that were due every week. I asked him how many he was willing to complete. He told me none. I countered with why not turn in one and I would give him credit for all five. That’s not fair, some of you would say.”

Several students nodded. “So how many would you be willing to turn in?” I asked one of them.

“All five,” she replied.

“And it seems unfair that this kid could do only one and get credit for all five, right?”

Nods.

“Well, the first week, he turned in one assignment and it was really bad, but I honored my word and gave him credit for all five assignments. The next week he did one assignment and he got an 85%. The next week Dee did three assignments. The next week he completed all five assignments. He did all he could do and passed my class. I expect the same from everyone in my classes.”

“Third, even when it requires uncomfortable conversations. I had to have some difficult conversations with Dee, but I wasn’t going to let him fail. And if it comes down to it, I’ll have difficult conversations with you, not your parents, you. Your parents are not in this class, you are. And I’m going to do all I can to help you make it through.”

“Got it? Fourth, even when it means I won’t fit in. I am a morning person, all day long. Every day of the week is my favorite day. I get up in the morning and go WHOO-HOO it’s Monday! Or Tuesday! Or Friday! I love life. I’m like this all the time. And to be honest some people find that annoying and feel like I’m rubbing them the wrong way. So my thoughts to you are, if I’m rubbing you the wrong way, you need to turn. This is the way I am. I am happy this way. There are enough grumpy people in the world, I’m just not one of them.”

“Fifth, even when no one else will know the difference. I will do nice things for you, just because. For no other reason except I want to. Accept it. I don’t expect anything in return. So if on a random Thursday you show up and there’s a bag of cookies on your desk, just enjoy them. You deserve them, for just being you.”

“And finally, even when it requires me to treat others better than they’ve treated me. There was this kid, let’s call him Ben. I hated Ben, HATED Ben! And I don’t hate anyone. They put Ben in my classroom because he couldn’t get along with the kids in team sports. Team-freaking-sports. So they put him in my little classroom. He made my life hell. Every day I’d pray he’d be out sick.”

“Well, one day Ben actually completed an assignment and I told him that I would bring him some cookies the next day. He basically told me to f-off. Toward the end of the day, I got an email asking me to come to the office. When I got there, Ben was sitting in a chair outside the principal’s office. I thought it figures, he’s such an idiot. The principal pulled me in and asked me if I could verify whether or not the bright orange jacket on his desk was Ben’s. Ben didn’t have a bright orange jacket. In fact, only one kid in the whole school had that orange jacket, and it wasn’t Ben. Ben had stolen the jacket and gotten caught. I confirmed it wasn’t Ben’s jacket and smiled to myself. Ben would get at least a couple of days out of school suspension and I’d be free of him.”

“When I left the principal’s office, Ben’s aunt had just arrived. Ben’s aunt. Not his mom. Ben’s mom had abandoned him. Ben’s aunt started to yell at Ben, called him things no person should ever be called. Ben just stared at the floor.”

“Three days later when Ben returned to school, do you know what was waiting on his desk?”

“Cookies,” Terrance said.

I nodded. “Ben picked up the cookies and brought them to my desk. He handed them to me and said he didn’t deserve them. I told him that he did. He’d completed his assignment. He argued that he’d stolen the jacket. I told him that was in the past and we needed to move forward and for him to enjoy the cookies.”

I paused.

“Ben was the best student I’ve ever taught. Never have I had a student work as hard as he did. When he went to prom, he brought his date in for me to meet her. Integrity feels best even when it requires me to treat others better than they’ve treated me.”

The bell rang. “Test on my seven rules tomorrow!”