The Safe Sex Talk They Should Have Given in School

I don’t know what you were taught in school or if you were taught anything at all, but even as a teenager I was extremely aware of how ridiculous sex education was. What is even more ridiculous is the fact that some schools don’t even discuss it or that they are even allowing calling the class sex education. While I might not condone minors engaging in sexual activity it does not change the fact that they do it with or without permission.

For us, sex ed was a class dedicated to learning the human anatomy (something that is truly useful) and how to remain abstinent until marriage. Last I checked the teaching of no sex is not education on sex. When it came time for students to ask questions we either were too shy to ask or were shot down claiming it was an "inappropriate" question. Being curious about intercourse in a class that is made for that type of conversation should never be inappropriate unless asked in a vulgar way.

The first time I did have sex I was not prepared, I was anxious the entire time, and nervous for weeks after of getting pregnant. Luckily for me, I had a nurse for a mother who was truly my best friend and I opened up to her after the event. Unfortunately, not all kids have parents they can talk to about these things and go through this utterly alone. While I could give an entire speech on parenting and sex this is more dedicated to the schooling in our country and how they are lacking.

What we should have been taught is how condoms work and why they should be used. There should have also been time set aside for birth control, consensual sex and what that means, where to get tested for STDs, symptoms of certain STDs and the knowledge that you have someone to go to if you need to talk about certain situations. I get that adults think this type of talk gives a shove to kids to go out and have intercourse but I can assure you this is not the case.

Yes, a few kids might have been scared to have sex and this talk could comfort them for their first time. I would like to think that, as a parent or teacher, this would be a better alternative than jumping into a big life moment not knowing the consequences or simple safe practices. We teach sex like it is a bad thing only married people are allowed to do and it creates this generation of people who grow up keeping these conversations and questions in their heads.

I didn’t realize until a few years ago that sex can cause UTI’s in women if they don’t use the bathroom after. Knowing these fact years ago would have helped me avoid unnecessary pain I got every time I had sex. Sadly, I didn’t even realize you could only get pregnant during ovulation until I graduated high school because no one had ever told me this.

Not to say babies are ever a bad thing but a lot of kids, if taught safe sex practices, probably would have never had the slip up that led to them becoming pregnant at such a young age. It is not just the lack of education but the idea that we should not talk about these things that causes problems in today’s society when it comes to communication on intercourse. I have a fact for you: everybody (human and animal) has sex and it is completely normal. I would rather my kid know this and be comfortable talking to me than doing something they are not ready for.

I would never say that teachers or parents are to blame for the problem we face today, that is a ridiculous gesture. They are only doing what their parents and the parents before them did. Instead of putting blame on someone maybe we should stop and look at the situation. Just because we have never communicated about sex does not mean that is what we should keep doing. Change is a good thing for growth.

Once we start to see a need for change, that is when the conversation can open up. Instead of feeling alone we should all feel open to talk about sex practices, safe sex, and even different problems we face in the bedroom (although this could wait till a little older). Not talking about sex doesn’t stop it from happening, it just makes it that much more confusing when it does happen.