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For Those Who Fight For The Ghost Children

The darker side of SEND Rights.

By Kyra ChambersPublished 2 years ago 5 min read
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I have not had the easiest of lives, sometimes I wonder if the mirror I broke when I was fourteen carried more than the standard seven years bad luck. There have been folks along the way without whom I wouldn't be sat here today and I hold each one in my heart dearly and your names are written on my soul.

When I first started thinking about how to approach this letter of gratitude, I couldn't figure out how to pick someone, a few people, out of all of those who have had a positive impact on my life, how to not offend anyone by not mentioning them. Something happened today to help me make that choice, and I'm sure my nearest and dearest will forgive me for choosing this over personal mentions, especially those who know how dear this subject is to me.

So many people are unaware of a silent conflict that rages between local authorities, schools and parents when it comes to Special Educational Needs educational provison and accommodations. Particularly in the UK, SEND educational provision is vastly underfunded and this lack often leads not only to many children being unable to access education, but much misunderstanding and red tape surrounding critical issues such as school attendance. A recent article in The Telegraph highlighted '100,000 missing ghost children' with the connotations that it was Covid issues or truancy interfering with the return of these children to education. The reality is that many of us with SEND children realised in lockdown our children were unable to cope, had been masking, had actually needed that break to focus on mental wellbeing, and that many of these 'ghost children' are in fact children in desperate need of vastly underfunded services to help them access education without trauma.

Courtesy of Special Needs Jungle/ The PDA Society

If my child is a ghost, they are an angry ghost, haunted by the trauma of unmet need for years. Families like mine have been asking for help for years and been denied, this lack of support often leading to the young person being unable to attend through no fault of the parent. Rather than looking into the failures of the existing system, the Government has decided to place importance upon attendance, meaning children who are unable to attend for medical reasons such as mental health are still marked as unauthorised even if evidence has been offered, even if the child is on a waiting list. Evidence is asked for from services with massive waiting lists spanning years, without which the threat of prosecution looms, but what can a parent do when asked for evidence gatekept by services they cannot access in a timely fashion and the alternative is prosecution?

This is where we now find the people I want to thank. Every day in the UK, families like ours face this situation and SEND and Educational law can be confusing and hard to navigate. Trying to help bridge the gap in understanding between schools, Local Authorities and parents can be an endless and thankless task. However there are some truly brave souls out there who are constantly pushing for better council policies, better access to education, offering their free time to attend meetings as advocates and represenatives, who meet with council boards, focus and feedback groups, pushing for a change we drastically need. Folks who spend hours online sharing educational resources, life experiences, describing their own long battles with local authorities for the benefit of those who walk behind so others can learn from their experiences.

I see you.

I see your pain.

I know there are probably a thousand other things you want to do than expose your life hardships in their intimate detail to draw attention to the growing crisis in our country of forgotten children.

I know how it feels shouting into the void.

I know how it feels to have your words used against you.

I know how it feels to be invalidated.

But without you, I wouldn't be here, standing albeit shaky with fear, wobbling like a tree in a storm that refuses to fall. From your example and words, I draw inspiration. From your guidance, I draw hope. From your low moments, I know I am not alone. From your stories of success, I can see a future for my daughter, even if right now that seems far away. Without the voice of every single parent, advocate, professional to highlight how much our children need help, we will lose our future. Our brilliant, bright young neurodivergent generation cannot have their light extinguished like it was for so many of my own.

Together we can be the tide that breaks down these barriers. Together we can call for change and be heard, not a few voices calling in the darkness but a chorus that will not be denied.

My heroes today are anyone and everyone fighting that long hard battle for their children's right to education. For those who speak against the forced conformity and for finding better accommodations to support children rather than change them. For those offering groups and places to support our young people when NHS services are too stretched. For those advocates reminding us every single day that being Neurodivergent isn't a curse.

I see you, I salute you, I thank you.

For help on my journey, this is dedicated in particular to Jo R, Anna-Cornwall Sendiass, Parent Carers Cornwall, Tigger P, Kate B, Jodie I, Jackie W, Kathy K, Davina S, Sarah B.

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About the Creator

Kyra Chambers

Autistic (PDA) & Neurodivergent writer.

Vocal Plus Fiction Awards Finalist.

Find my full article list at The Chambers Chronicles

Tips/Subs appreciated but never expected.

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