A Former Teen's Advice to Graduating Seniors

I graduated 20 years ago. I feel nostalgic seeing photos and memories classmates are posting on social media. The difficulties blur into happier, sometimes bittersweet memories. I learned from my mistakes and have some regrets. But I can't change my decisions and I also learned from my successes and failures.

So here goes my advice for you high school seniors this year:

Take Life at a Moderate Pace

It's tempting to rush into adulthood or stagnate in childhood. Both extremes take a toll on physical and mental health. Settling in at a moderate pace helps you through the marathon at the optimal speed for you individually.

For example, I rushed into college for five consecutive semesters varying from 14-21 credits a semester. I burned out two or three times and felt suicidal during the fifth semester. I had to slow down for two years to recover. If I could go back, I would have spread out my semester credit load, so I had sustained energy longer.

Watching other teens, I see promising athletes and scholars rush into college and expect they can maintain the same rigorous workload as they did in high school. Some burn out or drop out. College classes are usually harder than high school courses. Additionally, living away from home causes a loss in "productivity."

So, be patient with yourself as you make this HUGE transition, and take the time you need to adjust.

On the other hand, some teens fail to grow because they don't challenge themselves in some way. They need a job and some academic growth to ease into self-sufficiency. The stagnation can lead to frustration, depression, or addiction.

For example, when I burned out my college junior year, I stopped working toward my goals and sought too much pleasure. I read more fiction, stayed up late, and consequently gained weight. I also developed a binge eating disorder when I had to return to a schedule.

So, push yourself to do a little better each day for your physical and mental health.

The Adage "Follow Your Dream" Without a Reality Check Is Candied BS

Movies, memes, and other shortsighted, feel-good stuff deny reality. I dreamed of being a famous author/actor/professor. Others dream of being a famous artist/athlete/writer/actor/humanitarian. We also gloss over the personal sacrifices (sometimes unhealthy ones) it takes to reach that level. Most people do not achieve fame. A few do. Think of all the homeless or poor people in LA who want to be in the movie industry.

People say follow your passion, but does that passion pay the bills? When some passions don't pay well, then people feel frustrated or bitter they are in large amounts of debt or don't earn enough. The jobs I qualify for with an English language degree only pay $10-$20 an hour ($20k-$40k a year). My husband with a computer science degree can make $30-$60 an hour ($60k-$120k a year). My husband wanted to be an actor (still does), but he followed a different passion that had greater earning potential.

My degree in the humanities works as long as I accept that it isn't that profitable. If my family had to live on my potential income, we would downscale significantly.

So the truth is "follow your dream with a big dose of reality." Many people have found they can follow a primary or secondary passion for their day job. A job may only be a means to follow your passion. That works. Your passion may be a side gig or a personal hobby. Occasionally, the hobby becomes profitable.

Consider Appropriate Post-secondary Training for Your Goals

We have two camps concerning job training--college or working up the ladder. Some push for menial jobs, or working your way up. We have an entire education system pushing for college. And we have the middle ground of short training programs. Which one should you choose?

First off, a college degree does not guarantee employment. It improves your chances in many careers, but not all. Colleges are in the business of academics, fundraising, well-roundedness, and discoveries. Only some colleges have a specific mission to earn a living. So you have to be a picky customer with classes and internships at college for a great career. Personally, I wish I had taken graphic design, publishing, and marketing classes to broaden my career options.

The high cost of college education deters many students. We are talking $20k for a Bachelor's degree, not including housing and food. You either need scholarships, financial aid, side jobs, or loans to complete a degree. US students owe a median average of $17k in student loans.

It's okay to live with family while you further your education. You can save money to enable you to move out successfully later. Also, you may need a transition period. For example, I lived at home while earning my associate's to step forward to living independently at a university. (My junior college offered me free room and board, but home offered me mental help.)

College is still within reach if you desire it. Consider colleges that are cheaper or offer more scholarships. For example, junior colleges are cheaper and offer more scholarships. My junior college had a scholarship fund that partially paid for most local students' tuition. And my junior college offered me a full-ride scholarship versus universities that offered me partial-tuition or zero scholarships. Some cheaper college options may be online, such as Southern Utah University or BYU Pathways. Southern Utah University offers an online general Bachelors for $9k ($75 per credit). BYU-Pathways offers classes at $79 to $125 a credit with several majors (has several moral eligibility requirements).

Secondly, training programs and internships open up many career possibilities available after only weeks or months of training. Some of these programs include dental assisting, electrician, paralegal, medical coding, phlebotomy, CNA, truck driving, mechanic, and so on. This training increases the hourly wage by several dollars. Some of these jobs even pay more than jobs requiring a degree.

Third, climbing up the ladder at a job is an option too, but it has limits. You can only go so far up the ladder in upper management. Some of these jobs are prone to disappear with technology or become more technical. However, many of these jobs are a stepping stone to gain experience and pay for further training. Some jobs, like trash collectors, will always be in demand. If you are satisfied with a high school degree-only job, that is fine as long as it meets your needs.

Most importantly, learn how to learn because you will probably change careers several times. All jobs require a certain amount of learning, and it will go faster if you know how to learn efficiently.

And That's All Folks!

Hopefully, my advice can help you as you transition into adulthood. Remember to pace yourself, follow a dream within your reality, and consider your options for job training. Especially remember earthly and heavenly angels surround you to guide you through your journey.

Finally, congratulations on completing 13 years of schooling.

Or what felt like 20 years of schooling due to the pandemic!