A Family Nobody

Does anyone out ever feel like they are a family nobody? Actually, this is about me and that is how I feel 95% of the time since moving South. My sister moved me and my mom down here to help my mom, but underneath the reason was to try and get her first daughter's now ex-husband out of the house for he was lazy and not a really nice type of person some would say two-faced most of the time. It has now been 12 years since moving down here and my mom has gone to heaven and now, I am pretty much alone.

The reason my sister works as a nurse practitioner as well as starting two work-at-home jobs to make extra money and she goes out to do exhibits and goes to conferences and conventions for her true profession and her work-at-home jobs. This is going to sound like I am feeling sorry for myself, but when she is gone the others unless they need someone to babysit or need a house or yard cleaned, I am basically by myself. They always say come over anytime and when I do visit, they usually end up either going outside to smoke or they go to their bedrooms and lay on their bedrooms, and I am not the type to do this and end up alone again.

It has really always been like this and a lot of time I really would like to move back to my hometown up North. I still have friends up there, since I started following them on Facebook. I have tried to get a regular job down here, but after all these years I am not going back to school for if I want to work as a nurse for after 12 years I would have to be retrained and go back to nursing school and I cannot afford to that for I have already earned my advanced degrees and I would have to get another school loan and I already paid off all my loans. I have tried to get a job down here but sorry to say I have no references for the people I had as references are in another state and have died.

I feel like a nobody in this family now for the kids that I cared for meaning by great-grandnieces and nephews are grown, but when younger they were told not to listen to me for, I was told that their ex-stepfather if you can call him that told them to not listen to me and I was told by their new step-father that I was undermined in watching them. When everyone gets together it just seems that I just do not fit in for I have really no memories that they have and they all talk of things I do not know. NO one really even notices that I am in the room most of the time unless they need something down as a chore or something. These are the many reasons I feel like a family nobody. I really do not fit in most of the time. My sister needs things done around the house and I do what I can, but I am now 60 years of age and believe it or not as one does get older you really cannot do what you used to at 20, 30, 40 or 50 years old even though you try your best. Then you start hearing why can't he do it we all work all he does is read and write. I think they do not believe that book reviewing is a real job like theirs, and that is why I think that I am the family nobody for I really do not have much to share but maybe giving presents on birthdays and Christmas, and when they do open the gifts I give them I really do not think they even like them.