Uniform Girl
I dont fit in Creator Mariann Carroll
Where do I start? How about wearing a Uniform that is only blue and white, I feel so Unique! I write this with sarcasm. Was I the only one that feels this way? I was forced to go to an all-girl school caused, my mom felt it would help me stay out of trouble. I was in 9th grade in high school and I did not feel like I fit in. I did not like that I won't see any boys in school at all! I think I am ahead of myself. How will I get a date for prom? To be honest, I didn't really like how I look and feel in my boring uniform. I feel the Uniform may have really caused my insecurities. My high school was full of diverse girls from all kinds of races to different sizes/shapes.
Let talk about the Uniform, shall we???? We wear a white button-down shirt with a collar and a plain dark blue skirt that's supposed to pass our knees but some girls try to push it a little higher. We can wear blue pants but I wear a skirt cause I wanted to feel feminine, ok? Some girls in my school are smart, they change out of their uniform before going home after school. I, on the other hand, don't have time for that. I have to hurry on out from my last class and go get my bag from my locker before catching the public bus home. By the way, I had to take two buses to get home. I had to Iron my Uniform and that's an extra task. The Uniform I was wearing was not tailored to fit my body type or size properly. I never wear that uniform with confidence. I pray that I don't bump into anyone on the street, I might know in my Uniform. Don't get me wrong, my high school had a good academic record but as a teenager, what you wear matters. Yes, you can say, " I was a shallow teenager." I would ride the bus taking a seat at the very back of the bus so no one could see me in that hideous uniform.
Let's talk about not having any boys in our school.
The Only time boys are allowed was when we were having a play performed in our school. Our high school had to collaborate with the nearest all-boys school in our area. When everyone knew about these boys were in the building rehearsing for the play, the girls in our school found excuses to take a sneak peek in the auditorium of the school. In my mind what's the point of me going to look if I did not feel pretty in my uniform. I would just be feeling awkward and shy. There were times some boys from the all-boys school would hang out at the back of our school to met girls. You would hear the buzzing news of excitement going around the school. Most of the girls will make an excused to go in the back of the high school building even if it's out of their way of going home. I avoid that area, which in my mind, I was not attractive enough to be noticed, compared to the other girls. Talk about lack of confidence? I felt, if there were boys going to our school and attending classes, I would not feel so awkward.
Looking back now, My feeling of awkwardness and lack of confidence had nothing to do with the uniform. It's about the negative thoughts I feed into my brain that were the root of my insecurities.
About the Creator
Mariann Carroll
Proactive for positive change.Born in the City of Chicago ,Illinois.
Multi race .Studied in a foreign country .Fluent in several languages .
fascinated by diversity.A Romantic and a dreamer.Interest in healthy living
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