The Unrequited Word

This is a story about a a man who desires to write. He toils to find the words to inspire and evoke thoughts of "wow" from his readers. He wants his prose published. And though he loves his prose and passion for the written word, he discovers that in this artificial world, getting his writing out to the planet and perhaps, getting published and achieving fame and fortune doesn't happen that easily. Ah me, oh my, oh well...

So the man decides to evoke his muse and just write for the hell of it. He writes whatever his muse tells him to, and nothing he writes fits any particular genre. He reads about writing and publishing, and he tries to be like the mass of writers out there; he tries to follow the norms and the conventions, and the BS just overwhelms him. To hell with it all, says the writer. I'll just write for my own enjoyment! I'll do it my way!

But then, lo and behold, the writer meets the girl of his dreams, and the reason he finds her is that she discovered his writing online. She fell in love with his words and as a result, she fell for the man who so deftly wrote them. He had not even met her in person, yet. So they chatted and texted and sexted and became lovers before they even met. Strange, thought the writer. How could this be? We're a bunch of cybernuts!

The writer had strong feelings for this lady and she for him. Isn't love divine? And so the writer decided to go meet this wondrous woman who worshipped his words. What could go wrong? Love through writing. What a concept!

The first time the writer drove up to the lady's house, he was filled with trepidation and excitement all at once. The fear came from thinking too much, a process that the writer had decided to avoid in order to be a good writer. But what if? What if this cyber romance was false? The writer knew such a thing might happen because when people meet in person, they will discover things about each other they really don't like. The writer knew that this wondrous lady might kick his arse out the door if she decided he wasn't what she expected.

On the other hand, the writer knew his words spoke Truth. He did not lie when he wrote. His words were clear, concise and beautiful. It was no wonder that the gorgeous lady fell for him, because his words were HIM. They reflected his Truth, and she liked it. So the writer let the excitement and joy of meeting his lady love be paramount. He drove the fear away. And that night, having experienced bliss with her, he knew he had done the right thing. The writer gave thanks to his words. He was grateful for their role in bringing him and his girl together. But what if...? What if this romance was meant to be short lived? How would the writer know? He decided to use his words as an oracle. They would not lie to him. They would warn him of what could happen.

His words also did their job by seducing the lady even more. They brought stars to her eyes. Both the writer and the lady were so madly in love that the writer felt a new fear: suppose his words were also blind and love was just a starship that would soon warp speed out of sight? The writer discovered that his words did not flow like they use to, when he was alone and unencumbered by love. Ah me, oh my, oh well...!

For many years the writer enjoyed the company of his lovely girl but he began to feel empty inside. He explored his feelings in classic works and in modern prose. He scoured the library and the internet, and hungrily ate the words of the Bard, of Whitman, Emerson, Austin.... of so many writers and poets that seemed to understand what he was going through. He tried to rationalize what he was feeling. He even read 30 Shades of Grey and wondered what the hell it was about!

So the writer decided to just go back to his original method and write. He wrote and wrote and wrote and didn't stop to edit or scrutinize his words. He wrote every day, from the moment he woke up to the wee hours of the following morning, and he was admonished by his lady to take a break and get some rest and sustenance. But the writer could not find solace in the material things she wanted him to do. He had her love and caring, but his own soul was lost.

After several weeks of feverish writing, the writer decided to review his words. He was shocked at what he saw! The writing was unlike anything he had ever done. He wondered who he had become, for the person who wrote those words was not the one who had written so many love letters to his girl. The writer was so distraught, he thought about ending his life. Who had he become? Why was he writing differently? And what would his girl think, if she read what he had written?

There was only one way to find out. The writer collected his document and presented it to her. He asked her to read it in its entirety and to give him honest feedback, even if it was hurtful. He emphasized to her that what she would tell him meant the world to him but he needed to know her Truth about his writing.

For several days the writer's girl read the document, and many times, she seemed perplexed and went back to reread certain passages. The writer kept his distance, but watched her, concerned with her reactions. Occasionally, she would write on a pad of paper and then resume reading. The writer made food for her so she would not be interrupted. The lady appreciated his gestures but seemed to be stricken by reader's remorse and the writer felt that the worse was coming after she was done.

Finally the day came when she had read the entire manuscript and the writer eagerly and fearfully waited for her to tell him what she thought. But the lady didn't come to the writer. She went into the bedroom and lay down on the bed and fell asleep. The writer patiently waited for her to rest so she could collect her thoughts and tell him what he wanted to know.

The following day, the writer went to check on his girl and was shocked to find that she had died in her sleep. The writer was now doubly distraught. He had lost his lady love and he would never know what she had thought of his story.

After the funeral the writer decided to leave the house and return to his original writing area, where he had been so happy before he met the lady. He moved back and after settling down, decided to see if he could find his original self. He tried to write but he could not. In frustration, the writer decided to read his last manuscript. As he went through it, he stumbled across the pad where his girl had written notes about it.

The writer read her handwriting and tears came to his eyes. He could not believe what she had written. She wrote:

"My dearest love! How talented a writer you are! I fell in love with you because of your writing, but I never knew you could write like this! You inspire me every day and my heart is so bursting with love for you as I read this story. I love you so much I can barely function. You are my life and my heart will always belong to you. Never stop writing, and never think that you are not a great writer. Someday the world will discover you. I only hope I'll be there to applaud you with them. I love your story. I love YOU! I wish I could express my feelings to you in my own writing, but I lack your greatness with words. You wanted my feedback and this is it. I am amazed and thankful for you and I know this world (and I) will never be the same if you leave it. This is the greatest story I've ever read and I'm so blessed that you shared it with me. I love it!"

The writer took a day to compose himself, then returned to his writing. You will know his name, someday. He is meant for greatness. His words will astound you and he will be known for them. Until that day comes, enjoy whatever writing you can read.