Speed Dating Memory Lane

To sum this experience up in one word; CALIENTE! However, I do not recommend my life for anyone, I am thankful I survived madness and came out with grace. Now I have lots of stories to share, makes me proud of the person I have become today. But back in 2011, I was starting to become someone I would later hate. For many years I have felt like a failure, despite my achievements, my depression had me fucked up! Glad that part of my life is over, now I speak.

It was December 2011 and I had finally accepted that my beloved Ex was over me and I attempted to move on. How I moved on was completely unhealthy, but the good news is , I have learned many lessons and I have awesome stories as a result.

The proper way to move on from someone is to focus on yourself. Create goals and do not date until you accomplish some of your goals, if not all. You want to rebuild your self-confidence and you cannot do this dating around. I wish I had this mindset back in 2011, who knows where I would be today. I want to show that as long as you are alive, there’s always time to do better.

Back in 2011, I was a mess to be honest. I was a Guest Relations Manager, making money at The Doubletree Metropolitan, a very beautiful landmark property in New York City and in my unhandled trauma mind.. I was living it up!

What I was actually doing was trying to numb the pain of my depression by behaving wildly. Thankfully those days are over, follow the rules folks. After 40, some things and behaviors are no longer cute. I am all about aging gracefully. You do not preserve your youth by buying the latest clothes nor doing something to your hair. Not even plastic surgery helps in preserving your youth.. you may look young darling but you also look like you’ve had work done aka not cute.

Unfortunately back in 2011, I was all about living it up. I was hot Karen vibes with my NYC job and through this website called, Meet up I found a Speed Dating event with Firemen! Like I mentioned earlier, caliente!! I thought to myself.. I must attend! So I invited a co-worker and off we went.

I got so drunk I do not remember the location of this lounge but somewhere downtown NYC. There were plenty Firemen, some even had Calendars. It was quite a hot event. A unisex bathroom, muy caliente to say the least.

I began chatting it up with one Fireman, we danced and we kissed! Yeah I had fun I guess but what really got me going porno style was whom I bumped into in the bathroom, I even had a lollipop in my mouth. A real life porno I guess, I’ve had many porno style moments. A long time prior to that evening I was scrolling on Facebook and noticed a hot guy on one of a mutual friend’s page. I never said anything to anyone.. I didn’t even like the photo, I just thought to myself.. this guy is hot. Life went on a usual, until the night of the event and I’m at this hot party, who do I bump into??? The hot guy from the photo! We bumped into each other in the unisex bathroom and I drunkenly say “I know you” the guy was speechless but we began to talk and I told him about the photo of him I had seen on Facebook. Small world or manifestations?? They say be careful of what you wish for. Granted I did not wish for this guy, but as I mentioned previously when trying to get over someone.. you should not be dating around or hooking up.. you will get into trouble. Because everything about that night was sexy, the event was hot and the Fireman from the Facebook photo was really hot! Costa Rican/Puerto Rican or Salsa con Fuego if you will, but by the end of that night... I was drunk and at a train station alone. This is not the way that a lady should be treated but guys only respect when/ if you respect yourself and my behavior was telling, despite my achievements I did not respect myself. Why should anyone else?

I know now that due to how my parents brought me into this world, which was through an affair that I would have to suffer in this life. It’s just the way it is, ladies if you break up a marriage.. what makes you think you’re going to have a happy home? I am glad I did my thing and by 40 (not many people can say that) now I can begin to age gracefully. This means preserving myself and my energy. I do not just give it away anymore, February marks one year!

If you want to bang me, you must marry me. You must be accomplished as well, I am. You must match my values, this may be too much to ask out of today’s man. Trust and believe that if this is too much to ask.. I want nothing to do with you! Peace and enjoy The Vibe! The speed dating vibes!