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My Baby with Bree

Where are you Jules

By Timothy KincaidPublished 2 years ago 7 min read
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Photo By Canva Pro

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It's been a little over a month since Bree and I spent the most beautiful night together. We played house for one day and night while on Spring Break.

We made love in her bed. My Bree and I kissed under the stars. My Soul and I consummated our commitment to each other as the sun rose over the horizon. Before her sister came to chauffeur her to their parents' beach house.

That night I knew she was my once in a lifetime love. I would die a thousand cruciating deaths for her scent, taste, and touch. It would be the night that would change the course of our forbidden love.

---

"Baby, I can't understand what you are saying. Slow down and take a breath," I say.

"Sweetie, I haven't had my period for 2 months. I'm over at Candice's. Can we come to pick you up?"

"Yes, Baby. Sure come on."

I'm trying to comprehend what she is trying to say. Why is she so upset over missing her period? Then it came to me like a tidal wave. My God, if she hasn't had a period, that means she is pregnant.

People had warned me in the past to stay away from those fast tail girls. They will try to get pregnant to trap you. They view you as their ticket out of the Hood.

Bree isn't looking for a ticket out of the Hood, she's a rich girl. My heart, my air, my soul, my reason for being.

Candy's car pulls up. The horn blows.

"Mom! I'm going out with one of my Reading Club friends. I will be back later."

I walk out to Candy's car.

"Hey Baby. Hey Candy."

I hop in the back seat.

"Hey Kincaid," Candy says.

"Sweetie, we are going to Spindale Drug for a pregnancy test. I'm almost certain I'm pregnant; I always have my period at the same time each month.

Everything is going to be fine. Candice has had this happen to her. We know what needs to be done."

I'm in the back seat, speechless. The both of them go in and get the Test. We make it to Candy's basement.

"Tim, do you need something to drink?" Candy asks.

"Sure, do you have a soda?"

"Yea, but I figured you'd want something a little stronger. I'm having a beer."

"Okay, sure I'll have one."

Candy and I post up at the bar waiting on My Heart to see if we are pregnant.

"Candy, what do y'all mean you had this happen. Were you pregnant?"

"This doesn't leave the room. But yes, Stephen and I were pregnant last year. I had the Procedure."

"You mean an abortion," I whisper.

"Tim, honey, we don't say abortion. Yes, we were not capable of taking care of a baby. Plus, it would've ruined my chances of going to Carolina.

We had the Procedure and I will go to Chapel Hill in the fall. Everything worked out for the best. It's not as bad as you think."

Bree comes out with the test. It has a plus sign showing a positive result. My Love has tears in her eyes.

"I know we can't have a baby right now," she sobs.

I take her hand.

"I love you, Bree Bree."

"I love you Timmy."

We kiss passionately as if each other's saliva is air.

"You guys are so sweet to each other. I just love y'alls love," Candice says.

We plan to leave for Charlotte early Saturday morning. It's going to cost $385. I have a couple hundred from mowing lawns and Bree can get a couple hundred from her checking account. Candice will cover gas, since she will drive us.

It's 6:30 am. We are on the road to Queen City. Bree and I are in the back seat. We hardly speak, but kiss, cuddle, stroke and pet each other the entire way to the Planned Parenthood site.

We arrive at our destination around 8 am and park on the street. As we approach the nondescript building, it's as though they are having a Pep Rally. People are everywhere.

We walk down the sidewalk leading to the entrance. Advocates and Protestors line each side, trying to get our attention and attempting to hand out flyers and competing pamphlets.

The protestors shouted "Don't Kill Your Baby. Save a Life Today."

The advocates scream: "It's Your Body. Your Choice."

Each side holding enormous posters of cute babies and dead fetuses. The three of us hold each other tight as we walk the last steps to the entrance.

The lobby is filled with young girls and their mother's. I take a seat while Bree and Candice fill out a form. After about a 30-minute wait. Bree and Candice go with the nurse.

I sit and try not to stare at anyone in particular. A little girl, maybe 5 or 6 years old, walks up. She shows me her doll, explaining how Malibu Barbie lives on the beach. Her mom interrupts.

"Excuse me, sir, I'm so sorry. Jules, leave that man alone," she says.

"Oh, no ma am, no bother. Jules?"

"Yes, short for Julia."

I pull out a Hershey's kiss from my pocket.

"Is it OK?"

"Sure."

"What do you say, Jules?"

"Thank you, sir."

They take a seat. Jules reminds me of another 1st grader oh so many years ago. Candy comes out alone.

"She has to stay in the back where she will receive counseling. We can go to the nearby mall to kill time," Candy says.

I think, Yea, while they kill our baby. Candy and I had fun at the mall. We are in the center court and approach a large moving staircase. Candice and I attempt to get on. We both keep hesitating, afraid to step.

"Okay Kincaid, hold my hand. We will step together," she says.

Unbeknown to us, a small crowd is watching.

Okay. One, two, three.

We step. As we do, the crowd gives us a round of applause. We laugh at our first encounter with an escalator.

Candice and I make it back to Planned Parenthood. The crowds have dispersed and we take a seat in the waiting area. I doze off and have the most vivid dream ever.

I'm driving. Bree is in the passenger seat. Our two kids are in the back seat. Jules, our little girl, is the spitting image of her mom. Jaden, our son, looks just like me.

We are on vacation at Myrtle Beach heading for dinner. My Love is reading directions, her mouth is moving but I don't hear her words. However, I hear Jules from the backseat.

"Daddy, are we there yet?"

"Almost, honey," I say.

I look at Jules in my rearview mirror: her eyes, that smile, those dimples. I look over at my heart; she smiles. Bree is the most breathtaking creature I had ever laid my eyes on.

At that very moment, in space and time. I'm the happiest I will ever be; I have everything I will ever need. Suddenly, a gut-wrenching scream invades my peace. I can't make out what or who.

I glance in my rearview mirror; Jaden has vanished from his car seat without a trace. Jules becomes a picture of a dead fetus. I make out the screams, it's Bree:

"I Want Our Baby!!"

Her scream startles me awake. I look to see her approach, coming from the back office. She looks exhausted. We go back to Candy's basement and never speak of the Procedure. I think after going through such a horrific day. We would have the rest of our lives to have a house full of children.

It wasn't to be. Bree's mom finds contraceptives from Planned Parenthood. Bree comes clean about our secret love affair and the Procedure. Our last goodbye is too painful to write.

The night she departed is the only time I wept for My Bree and our baby. They shipped my heart to a Catholic boarding school in Maryland. I think I will never see her again.

……

FINAL THOUGHTS

Athletes possess an innate ability to compartmentalize. The thoughts of my Bree and Jules were buried so deep in my psyche, it would take a master psychiatrist to bring them back. The only solace that keeps me from total heartache.

Sometimes, in a quiet moment, as I stroll amongst the trees, I hear a faint sound like a rustling of the leaves. I glance up over my shoulder and feel a soft, oh so sweet, you can almost taste the morning breeze.

Her voice repeats our favorite line from the Tennyson poem "In Memoriam" most people mistake it for Shakespeare. My Bree Bree knows the truth.

"Tis better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all."

Teenage years
1

About the Creator

Timothy Kincaid

A freelance writer who offers ghostwriting ebooks, FaceBook posts, article & blog writing services. He works with B2B & B2C companies providing digital marketing content designed to drive traffic, increase conversion and SEO.

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