I'm sad to say I recently broke up with my lifetime soulmate, with whom I was together for several years, sharing some of the amazing memories I'm still reliving in my head over and over again. She's an amazing, hard-working woman still trying to make her way to the life she desires to live. Unfortunately for us, it all came down to a moment when I decided to work abroad for an undefined period of time, and as much as we wanted to hold on, the only right thing for both of us was to part ways.
One may grumle, why we don't have a long-distance relationship if we like each other so much. Well, a long-distance relationship can be nice and beautiful, but some people crave the physical touch and presence of their lover so much it ruins their life to not be able to do it and the thought of it ruined us since we already experienced that last year. Right now it still feels like I'm experiencing the toughest moments of my life, but gradually I'm becoming more reasonable about it and I want to help you get through it too. Here are some ideas on how to get yourself going.
Learn a new skill
Tough moments in life come and go, some leave a scar, some only a memory. But it's up to you whether these moments make you or break you. It's hard when all this time you had someone you could rely upon and now you need to handle it on your own. Try to find something within you that calms you, that makes you feel present, self-sufficient, and most importantly good enough. You were alone before you meet your love and you can do it again. I personally started playing the piano and I have never played it before. Over the days I got better and better and I started to express myself through music, sort of like the piano was crying instead of me. There's countless number of arts or public activities one can do to step a little out of its comfort zone. Go do it.
Stay active and healthy
I'm not a scientist on the human body and what happens if you workout, but what I do know is that if you stay persistent it makes you look helluva good, boosts your confidence, and builds you mentally stronger. In order to work out on a daily/weekly basis, you need to become consistent, organized, and self-disciplined - characteristics that not only keep depressive thoughts away but also improve the quality of your life. Start small and go big.
You're not alone
This one might sound a bit selfish and too much down-to-earth for the moment, but there are plenty more fish in the sea. Not to be rude, but if you stop looking at the past, you might as well catch the train to the present. Your future loved one is somewhere out there and I'm not saying you should go and find it, but usually, people with common lifestyles or whatever you're attracted, eventually converge together. Live your very best life and who knows who you might bump into. I guess it's written in the stars...
Don't Hope, Act
It's probably one of the best and at the same time worst things one can do - have hope. Hope is usually one-way traffic after a breakup and I'm not saying you should avoid it, but you should just be extremely cautious and reasonable enough for your own good when is the right moment to let go and you just hold on and wait for the time to do its thing. Time can heal wounds, but the clock might as well stop ticking for some along the way. Take control of it, take control over your happiness, and don't put it into others people's hands.
Share your thoughts
Open yourself to someone , share it with your sister, a friend or anyone you trust. But I don't mean to overstress but rather a conversation that you know is making you feel better and will calm you. Try to achieve a state of mind where you understand why things happen the way they did and why it's best for both of you to move on. Every time when the emotions hit you, try to bring yourself back to that state, repeat the conclusions or phrases you made, and cry if you have to - but never cry for the same thing twice.
Develop positive habits
Wake up earlier, make your bed, prepare yourself a healthy breakfast, go for a morning walk, practice meditation, and dedicate a part of the day to feeling grateful for everything you had and have. It's all about building a stable and positive life, without too much stress that can get you sad and overthinking. Get others people advice, read a biography and learn to mentally master yourself.
I must admit it was fairly tough for me to write the post and share the vulnerable part of me but I did it for the sake of all the men that hide their emotions, drown them in drinks, or even take their lives or lives of others. Love is a beautiful thing, but…