He is My Safe Person

I’ve been labeled before as “the girl who has to bring her man with her wherever she goes”.

Or “the girl who can’t be without her man.” But that’s not the case at all. I have anxiety, and my man is my safe person. ⁣⁣He is my safe place.

⁣⁣Moving ten hours away from my family when I was nineteen with a three month old, was tough. It was just my husband, my daughter, and me. We knew basically no one, had no friends, and my husband spent 99% of the time at work trying to build his career, the main reason we had moved away. ⁣⁣We moved so he could take care of us, and I could take care of our baby.

⁣⁣He then became my safe person. I had no one else. It was just our little world.

My anxiety got so bad that when we would go to the mall, my husband knew he would have to stand outside the washroom waiting for me to calm down, and come out when I was ready.

He always waited with our daughter. So patiently. Never rushing me. Telling me it was okay that I needed a minute. ⁣⁣He never let me feel ashamed or embarrassed I needed those minutes in the bathroom, calming my pounding heart and wiping sweaty hands.

⁣⁣He is the one who has laid with me on the cold bathroom tile while I cried and shook mid panic attack at two in the morning. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣He is the one who knows my triggers, and does his best to make me feel more comfortable when he can tell I am getting anxious. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣He is the one who has always been there for me, when friends have come and gone. When family could not understand my troubles. When the public looked at me like I was crazy. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣He is always there. He is my safe person. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣He is the person who makes me feel more secure, and less anxious. I feel better in situations with him, then I ever would alone. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣While I am working on going through anxious situations alone, for now, he is my safe person. Because he has always been there. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣So, yes, if I’m meeting you for the first time, I will bring my safe person, my husband, to help ease my anxiety. ⁣⁣

⁣⁣I do not bring my husband almost everywhere to be “that girl”. I bring him because he is my safe place. ⁣⁣I bring him because I love him. I bring him because he has won and earned and proved he is someone I can trust in those moments when everything else is unsure, and I am trying to decide if I can trust you. Someday, maybe, I will be ready to spend time with you alone. But in the meantime, its okay if you do not understand and do know know why I do not come alone.

⁣⁣He is my safe person. He is always there.