Coming Back to The United States

My biggest thrill in life happened when I was free to visit and stay up to six months, in the United States. I lived all my life on a small island in Italy, (island Sardegna), and I knew I wasn’t going to miss my chance to visit my aunt, who was living in California at the time. It was 1986 and I was only twenty-one years old.

It was fun and easy the first two months, after that my aunt told me I had to find a way to stay longer elsewhere. She said: -Only real pioneers can become successful in staying here. America, honey is not for everyone-.

I took my chances, I played my cards well enough to secure a good place -a room-, somewhere in Westwood-CA, where I met a nice family later from UCLA, where I was lucky to be able to take some free English lessons two times a week for one month.

This was a nice family in need of a nanny just like me. Was I a nanny? Hmm, I guess so! But I started as an Au-Pair and continued that way until I became a more professional role of a “Nanny type”, years later.

My stay in 86’ was pretty good, (for the time that I still had left to remain on vacation) -four months-. I’ve learned some English and how to cook a few dishes. How to love children, and care for them just like a mother does.

This was very gratifying to me. Coming Back home, after my first six months of experience in the States, I was surely developing some problems. At first, it was just light confusion and headache, but after a few months, it became a nightmare to live there because I felt like a prisoner of the Italian system, and my family was very old-fashioned and narrow-minded.

I had to find the way to go back “home” and it was California, not Italy anymore. I had some flashbacks of moments spent in Santa Monica beach, Malibu, and Zuma beach. Hollywood, Westwood, and so forth…

Finally, I was able to succeed after exactly six months. Somehow, I managed the situation and became fully aware -at twenty-two years old-, to be the only master of my destiny.

I came back to Los Angeles, a beautiful afternoon when the sun was coloring the blue sky with tones of orange and yellow. The light breeze was perfumed with accents from the ocean. The harmony I felt landing at the airport, was strongly perceived inside the plane and all around.

In America I had many opportunities to develop any hobby, a natural gift from the universe, a talent; I wanted to succeed in something. In Italy, I was often discouraged in trying to pursue the art of acting or even singing.

But I always wanted to be that type of artist and just like the gypsies, I had to follow my heart, and make the sky my roof and become a citizen of the world, sacrificing the comfortable life in a middle-class Italian family, where people do the same exact things for ages, without ever changing much.

I became poor for some years, and I suffered a lot of abuse from my first young husband, but eventually, I made it through. About ten years later, I was already working for some celebrities. I worked as a professional-set-assistant-nanny, for over twenty years and I loved every single minute of it. It was my paradise!

I was eventually encouraged -by some of my employers-, in pursuing show business, so I was thrilled with magic enthusiasm and ended up singing and acting in North Hollywood, for some years. Living with the stars makes you realize many things. Not all of them were really happy people. Many were showing a lot of insecurities.

I had the time to think about many aspects of show business, and the offers that every once in a while I was lucky to receive, here and there, from the agencies. Yet, I made my clear choice not to ever become a celebrity myself. It’s extremely stressful in very many aspects, and I know that stress is not part of my life in this world, any longer.

Coming back the second time to the United States, gave me the time to make new choices for my future and get ready to immediately hit the road, as my risks were always well calculated. I had to move on fast! I couldn’t sit down for too long, I had to stay busy and enjoy my life to the fullest.

My advice with all this is to make sure to first follow the magic whispers of your heart, your intuition, that part of you that knows where to direct an intention, even if yet, you might not see immediately the whole picture in your mind.

My destiny was to express myself through some kind of art, feel encouraged and inspired to do that, and I succeeded indeed and I feel self-realized for this today. America is my family now!

Be kind to yourself, because there is always an invisible part of you who is talking about your dreams, but there is also the part that doesn’t believe, is insecure, and is afraid to try new experiences.

When you dare to dive into the ocean of the unknown, even though you have a map, the territory will appear and disappear by magic, don’t worry and follow the flow of events, and you will find that all your dreams come true. So, coming back home is where the heart lives. Go there only, there is no other place, and celebrate your freedom to be where you know you belong.