The Lost Ones

Sleeping peacefully for the first time in over a decade ended too soon with the sound of Nightmare's voice Z, Z, Z wake up! Yelling Ah! What?! What? They replied The sun is already up and unless you want everyone to see me get your ass up Nightmare replied. Groaning all the while as we shifted between our forms I told them Wake me up like that again and I'll find a way to hurt only you, shithead.

Looking down at our body to see that I was currently naked. Nightmare commented The clothes are behind you. Quickly getting dressed I stretched while walking to the cafeteria. Looking down at my hands to see the corruption had reached my mid forearms now. This is alarming I thought. Nightmare said The corruption isn't there when I'm in control of our body. We need to tell the others about me. I replied Yeah I know, get ready for the alienation again.

Reaching the cafeteria a sweet meaty smell came wafting out the door. Bacon I thought with a smile. Making my way to our seat we saw a glass of orange juice and water ready. Asking a few people to pass the food our way they all made sure not to touch our hands.

We ate as much as possible while watching the others and making idle chit chat. Seeing that some were about to leave the table we stood up to say, "Everyone I need to tell you all something important." They all quieted down as their eyes lifted to us. "I know introductions have been put off since the new comers were brought here. My name is Z, my pronouns are they/them. Nightmare and I share my body. While we would like to get to know all of you better, especially by name. We have something that you all should know." There was nervous chatter throughout the table. We continued when everyone looked back up at us. Nightmare said You've got this. Taking in a sharp inhale before saying, "Since the day of the breakout Nightmare and I have been patrolling the island to make sure nothing came our way. Last night Nightmare took on a physical form which we want to show you all. It's mainly for all of you to know our other human form and so that way non of you feel like you're in danger. Another reason is for complete honesty on our side."

Letting our words sink in we waited until everyone seemed ready for the reveal. "Full discloser I'm going to take my clothes off. You can turn around if it'll make you feel comfortable. Nightmare will keep me modest." Watching the corruption go up our arms to cover the rest of our body. We took our clothes off before closing our eyes to feel the change begin to happen. Nightmare had full control of our body.

Opening our eyes to see through Nightmare's we saw everyone's expression. The underlying fear that they all tried to keep hidden resurfaced immediately. Nightmare said out loud, "My name is Nightmare, pronouns are he/they. Z is my older sibling, I took this form from their memories on a spur of the moment. I keep this form because I like it. Z and I will give you all some time to think and get some clothes that'll fit my body size." He walked to the doors being careful not to meet any of their eyes again. As we reached for the doors he said over their shoulder, "By the way it was nice meeting you all."

As Nightmare lead us to the shoreline it was the first time he had a chance to actually be in the moment. We sat down where the sea barely touched the sand. Looking out at the horizon we just listened to the wind rustle the leave, feel the sand with our hands. Nightmare asked That look we saw in their eyes never gets any easier does it? Replying Sadly no. We stayed there for awhile just relaxing.

Hearing an unexpected voice say, "And I thought everyone looked at me like I was a monster." Turning to see Nurse Ratchet heading our way she sat a few feet away from us. We ignored her by looking back at the sea. "Not a big talker huh?", she said inching closer. Side eyeing Nurse Ratchet she didn't get the message that we wanted to be left alone. "Look I'd rather be anywhere else, but I really need to talk with Z", she said. With a low grunt we turned to look at her fully to say, "Anything you say to me Z can hear and will answer." "Is there anyway for me to look at them? It's a private matter", she asked.

Lifting a finger Nightmare closed his eyes to meet me in the void. Are you sure you want to talk with her? Nightmare asked cautiously. Remembering the determination in her eyes I replied In all honesty I'd rather put one of those collars around her neck for everything she's done to me and the rest of us. She seems to have turned over a new leaf, I'll give her one chance and that's it. Plus it's always better to 'keep your friends close and enemies even closer' or so I've heard. Nightmare commented I really don't like her and if you ever want her to disappear without a trace you know where to find me. With a chuckle I replied I appreciate that little big brother. Seeing a light spark in their eyes he said with a smile That's the first time you've called me 'brother'. Taking a few steps to be at their arm length I held them in a tight hug for the first time as our bodies began to change.

Opening our eyes to see Nurse Ratchet in front of us Nightmare made sure to keep me modest. Feeling her eyes roam over our bodies I said, "Eyes up here lady." She leaned in to take a closer look at our eyes. "Damn, everything about you has changed."

"Well that's what happens when you properly bond with an alien."

"I'd really like to get a blood sample to run some tests."

"That's not going to happen any time soon."

"Understood, whenever you're ready. If you're ever ready."

An uncomfortable silence fell between us. Looking down at my hands I dug in the sand in a circular motion. "Does it hurt?", Nurse Ratchet asked looking down at our hands. "Not at all", I replied without hesitation. Seeing the corruption go down to the wrist again I thought Are you ok with walking around physically more often? Nightmare replied As long as you're ok with it sib. Sib? I asked waiting for the other shoe to drop. For sibling, or I could always call you sis. With a small smile I thought I don't really mind either. Nurse Ratchet asked, "Would you mind if I touched your hands?" Snapping my head up in surprise at her question I had a slight stammer as I answered, "Su-sure."

Lifting my hands out of the sand slowly Nurse Ratchet carefully touched both of them avoiding the nails entirely. Flinching at the soft touch she noticed and asked, "You ok? It doesn't hurt, right?" "No, not all", I replied looking away from her. Nurse Ratchet caught the tone and aversion of the eyes. She said softly, "At any time you're feeling uncomfortable, please let me know."

Scoffing I replied, "Now my comfortability matters." Seeing her whole body flinch at that comment. Nightmare said Good one. Quickly replying Not now, look at her. Actually look at her, that one cut deep. Still touching our hands gently she eventually lifted her eyes to say, "I deserved that, especially after what I did to you." Both Nightmare and I saw the truth in her blue eyes.

"If it makes you feel any better I immediately regretted saying that."

"I can tell...In all honesty I should be the one apologizing instead of getting handsy right now."

"Instead you're the first person who's willing touched me. Let alone my hands that scare everyone else, including me."

"In all honesty I find your hands fascinating. You helped me come back."

"How?"

"You freed all of us and reconnected me with Alexia. She and I were best friends when we were brought here. Anderson found out what I can do so she offered me a deal; if I agreed to interrogate any trouble makers then she would make sure Alexia wouldn't get hurt. Edgar tortured me for days and said that if I don't accept the offer he'll do the same to Alexia."

"Edgar did what now?" She clammed up after finishing her story. I still couldn't help myself from asking that question. Nurse Ratchet replied, "I'd rather not talk about it."

I nodded my head gently. Reaching out to Nightmare they commented I'm going to enjoy hurting that man, when should I start? Get him now and go all out I told them. Feeling him smile and he left to go cause mayhem somewhere else I felt a smile reach my own lips. Nurse Ratchet caught that to ask, "Something funny?" I replied, "Oh you can say the voice in my head told me a funny joke."

"Is the voice by any chance Nightmare? Cause if it isn't or your own I would be worried."

"Look at you telling a joke?"

"When you're a nurse you need a good sense of humor."

"Speaking of you being a nurse, I'm sure you don't want to be called 'Nurse Ratchet' anymore. Do you have any names that you'd prefer to be called instead?"

She needed a moment to think before saying, "Emilia, my name is Emilia Sanchez." With a nod of my head I responded, "You have a lovely name." She said with a smile, "Thanks I like your chosen name"

"Your welcome and thank you."

"If I may ask, why Z?"

"My folks showed me the tv show Xena Warrior Princess one day when I was five. I thought her name was spelled with z instead of an x. My dad called me Little Z from then on."

"That's kind of cute and extremely sweet."

"I haven't been called either one of those since my folks died."

"Maybe if you showed others that you're not just this big scary angry monster maybe everyone wouldn't be worried about talking to you in general."

"I'm sure it'll be easier when one of us finds a way to minimize the corruption on our hands."

"It's pretty interesting seeing that your fingers and nails are unnaturally longer than what they should be."

"Do you think there are some tests to see what can be done about the corruption spreading?"

"I personally think it's cool."

"You're one of the only people who thinks that."

"There doesn't seem to be any issues with your hands. I'd need to run some tests on the rest of your body to make sure nothing else has changed for the worse."

"Is there really an MRI machine on this island?"

"The underground lab has everything. The other scientists had to make sure nothing was wrong with their test subject soldiers."

"Test subject soldiers?"

"From what I heard the scientist were trying to make an empowered soldier. That's one of the reason they drew anywhere from a pint to a gallon of blood from everyone here."

"The lab...the kids."

"Kids?"

"You don't know?"

Emilia looked up at me with fearful eyes waiting to know what we meant by that. "Anderson and the other scientists had orphan kids all under the age of 18 come here to preform tests on. All of them died. Some of them barely lasted a week, they put them in a test tube inside the lab." The look on her face said it all, she had no idea kids were being tested here.

"They're still there in those tubes", I said getting up. Hearing Emilia trying to follow me I ran to the lab in a hurry. Looking at the test tubes it pained me to see all of them barely looking in any sense human now. With a blink of the eyes I saw what they used to look like before coming here. Hearing some panting behind me I turned to see Emilia looking at the test tubes.

Feeling Nightmare come back to me they said I worked him over good and I...Oh shit the kids. As my heart dropped I replied Yeah we need to put these kids to rest. Emilia's body began to shake, I offered her my hand which she took. We walked up the steps slowly all the while keeping quiet.

Making our way out of the building we saw some people on the beach who were heading to the cafeteria. Emilia didn't let my hand go until Hannah was by our side. She asked, "What's going on between you two?" Looking to her I responded, "Emilia and I went to the lab, she didn't know about the kids." Hannah asked, "Oh...oh god." Emilia said, "What's wrong with us holding hands anyways?" Hannah started to say, "Nothing, it's just unexpected. I was actually trying to find the both of you to say lunch is ready, sandwiches and soup."

With a slight grumble coming from my stomach we said, "Alright we'll take care of it after lunch then. You don't by any chance have a strong stomach, do you?" Hannah asked, "Why would that matter?" Answering with attitude, "Those kids deserve to have their bodies be put to rest so we're either going to burry them or cremation." Hannah kept quiet after that. Emilia broke the silence with, "I think we should all get some food, you can't get much work done when you're running on fumes." Hannah took her chance to run for the cafeteria in a hurry. Emilia looked at me before I nodded my head to follow Hannah. We walked just listening to nature. Reaching for the doors we both walked in to sit down and enjoy the meal that was made.

Word travelled fast as took the opportunity to tell everyone around what she just saw. As it reached Ed and Mat who were sitting right next to me they asked, "What's going on with you and Nurse Ratchet?" Looking between the both of them we answered, "Her name is actually Emilia." They looked to each other before looking back at me. I finished with, "After I showed all of you Nightmare's physical form I knew you all needed some time to think. We went to the shoreline just to relax. Emilia came over to talk with us, she even touched our hands." Mat asked, "All this time you've been lonely?" "I wouldn't say that exactly, we just got tired of all of you looking at us with fear in your eyes", we replied. Mat took a look at Ed and then at me. Ed said, "It's going to take some getting used to. Out of the two of us we've only known you for about a week combined. Now there are so many things happening and different changes about you and this place. If you give us some more time it'll just seem normal." "We understand and that's why we've been giving all of you some space. Hell we're still getting to know ourselves. Aside from that we mentioned the test tubes downstairs which Emilia didn't know a thing about. When we went down there she was really shocked."

Looking to Mat and Ed I said, "We're going to have to do something about the kids in those test tubes." Everyone within earshot who knew about the underground lab looked surprised some even flinched. "We were waiting to say something about that after everyone had some food in their system. We also wanted to get a vote on what we should do." Ed asked, "Like what exactly?" "Burial or cremation", we answered.

Silence fell over the room. Deciding to stand up to say, "Everyone we wanted to wait before announcing this grim fact. For those of you who have sensitive stomachs please leave the room for your own good." Everyone stayed seated to listen. I continued, "All new comers there is an underground lab that the scientists used to test on orphan children. Non of them survived longer than a week. There are about 10 down there right now, all in human sized test tubes. We wanted to ask which one would be better; burying or cremating their bodies. Why don't we put it to a vote? Anyone for burying raise their hand." Looking out at the table to see a few hands raised. "What about cremation?", seeing more hands the decision was made.

"Ok, I'm going to need some help to honor our deceased. We're going to need some people to make a wooden platform to burn the bodies with some flowers, 10 easels and charcoal, I'll also need someone to help with wrapping the bodies to bring all of them here. That offer is for anyone willing to come with me." Lily raised her hand first, "I can help with the flowers and the wood platform." Looking her way I nodded my head in appreciation with a tiny smile. Ashe raised his hand next, "I'll help in any way I can." Hearing him say that meant so much to us. Mat and Ed said, "We can take care of everything up here." Anya stood to say, "I'll help with the test tubes." I said, "I appreciate that."

Everyone stood to leave the cafeteria. Ashe, Anya, and ourselves walked back to the main building while the others followed Mat, Ed, and Lily into the woods. The walk was in silence until we reached the lab. Hearing Anya gasp at seeing these disfigured beings who were once children we felt our hearts breaking knowing what they used to look like. Nightmare told me Tonight I'm going to make all those monsters pay. Give me all the gorey details when you do I replied. Feeling his smile fade when Anya touched the test tube. Watching the water drain completely the tube began to rejoin the floor. To keep the body from falling I wrapped the child in my arms. With that touch I saw all their memories. This kid's name was Bobby and all he wanted in life was the warm embrace of a mother.

Taking in a shaky breathe as an unknow urge possessed me to hold him tightly. I felt his last moments alive were in fear and pain. My heart shattered for this little boy. An unknown hand reached out to touch my shoulder. Instinctually I let out a low growl while holding Bobby closer to me. With narrowed my eyes and a furrowed brow I saw that it was Ashe trying to talk with me. He took one look at me before moving back with his hands up to say, "Woah, woah mama bear. You know I mean you no harm." Taking in another shaky breathe Ashe continued, "I was just trying to say there's nothing we can do for these kids except give them a place to rest." Looking down all I saw was Bobby's sweet face. Saying, "I know, we also know this kid was named Bobby. He was a little overweight and wanted to be wrestler when he grew up. Bobby died scared and in pain. All he wanted was a mother to hold him. We were just trying to give him something that he didn't get in life." Ashe took a knee and scooted closer to ask, "How do you know all of that?" Feeling tears well up in our eyes we hid our face before saying, "I saw and felt everything through his eyes the second I touched him."

Ashe said, "I'm going to get something to wrap all of them in." Anya chimed in to say, "I'll come with." Barely being able to nod our heads we let a few tears out. Nightmare said Whatever feeling this is I hate it. Responding with It's called sorrow, humans feel this way when something hurts us deeply. Nightmare said I'm going to enjoy killing those monsters. There are far worse things than death and we'll be sure to make them feel that I replied. Nightmare embraced the both of us through my shadow.

Hearing Ashe and Anya come down the stairs Nightmare hid themselves. Looking up to see Ashe with a whole arm full of comforters we watched him lay one down to wrap Bobby from head to toe. Anya laid some comforters down in front of the other test tubes to be ready. She didn't even try holding back her tears. Repeating the same process for the other nine kids we all wrapped each of them tenderly.

Once each of them were wrapped I used my shadows to keep them off the floor. With the last kid wrapped and being held by my shadow I told Ashe and Anya, "Go get 10 canvases, plenty charcoal, then meet me and the others on the beach." They both ran up the stairs quickly. Taking our time going up the stairs we barely went outside the building before Ashe and Anya ran into us.

Seeing that the sun was beginning to set we all walked without saying a word. Reaching the beach we saw everyone around the platform. Noticing that Lily was putting the final touches on the platform I got close enough to see that she created a masterpiece with the flowers. Everyone kept their distance while still staying close enough to listen.

Everyone watched us getting closer. We took in a deep breath to look out at everyone to say, "These children's names were Jose, Bobby, Sally, Dawn, Rosa, Maria, Linda, Anthony, Dani, and Jesse. We will remember them for the kids they were before coming here. Anya and Ashe if you would please line up the easels." They lined up the easels side by side then gave me all the charcoal they had.

Using my shadows I focused on each of their faces and quickly drew all 10 at once. Writing their names and something they loved at the bottom; For Bobby it was wrestling, Jose and Rosa it was cooking, Dawn wanted to be an artist, Linda a doctor, Anthony a teacher, Sally a princess, Dani a mechanic, and Jesse a vet.

Turning around to place each body carefully down by hand I said their name one last time. With the last child being put down we used a new ability to start the fire. A sweet smell filled the air as the flowers burned first. Turning to make eye contact with Lily first and then the rest I said, "Thank you all for helping set this up, especially Ashe and Anya."

A somber moment passed before people started leaving. Some people got closer to say something around the lines of 'Rest in Peace'. Hearing the last person aside from us leave I started singing quietly, "I'm so tired of being here. Surprised by all my childish fears..." In that moment all the grief I had been keeping locked away for so long finally came crashing down. I cried, screamed, kicked and hit the sand. After some time I couldn't move my body anymore.

Feeling a pair of strong arms pick me up as if I was as light as a feather. Opening my swollen eyes to see Nightmare hold me close to his chest. They were in his human form, thinking this is new I closed my eyes again. He looked down at me to say, "Everything is going to be ok." For the first time in this life I felt like it just might be.