Aging Groups of Supportive Friends

In October of 2012, I was diagnosed with bronchitis. It was not bronchitis. Then I was diagnosed with pneumonia. It was diagnosed as pneumonia a second time and now we are in November of 2012. I was diagnosed with cancer.

They thought I had ovarian cancer and sent me to the University of Minnesota, to see a gynecological oncologist. I was told it was not ovarian cancer.

My next visit was in December. While at this visit I was told that a bone marrow biopsy was necessary. I was diagnosed with blood work with non-Hodgkins lymphoma.

It was now January of 2013, and the oncologist asked that I get a positron emission tomography (PET) scan, and a bone marrow biopsy prior to treatment or the watch-and-wait protocol. By this time, I was sleeping sitting up as I couldn't breathe when lying flat.

I had seen a medicine man and he told me where the cancer was located before the PET scan, that he could give me some medicine, and that when in the hospital I should continue the herbal medicine. And that I would be okay.

I ended up in the hospital, had a respiratory code, and was started on chemotherapy. I was told the cancer I have is treatable, probably not curable, and I went through chemotherapy, that was over in June of 2013.

Now, I have friends groups for cancer.

I have a continuing group of cancer survivors I met at a LiveStrong group held and partially supported by the YMCA. That group met several years ago for most of the year. We have had one member die from cancer, while most of the rest of us continue to meet.

We call ourselves the sisters of the Y or Ysisters.

If I feel like I need support more often I can check in with these sisters individually. Sometimes I do need that extra support. Then there are other cancer support groups that I have access to that meet monthly.

At 10 years out from chemotherapy, my oncologist put me in touch with a cancer therapist. I think his advice and helpful comments were helpful to other sisters in the group as well.

Most of my cancer support is my age and older. They have some of their own concerns and then some of my concerns as well.

I have been fortunate to have been in support groups since age 24. I celebrated 45 years in one, and 43 in another of those support groups in September. The thing I am most grateful for during those years is the practice of using a gratitude list to help me not feel sorry for myself!

It also helps me to think of others. Taking the focus off of me and my problems.

This is helpful when I am dealing with anything that could possibly cause you to feel sorry for yourself. My dad died on my tenth birthday, and my first husband was lost to his addiction and died young. And then there has been the loss of other family members.

Next, I would have to say my journey with my own addiction, diabetes, cancer, AFIB, UTIs, and a few other health-related issues along the way. These groups have helped immensely throughout my recovery. Addiction is staying negative, recovery is living positively.

I started out with primarily women in my support groups, but now there is a mixture of both. I attend meetings with others who have long-term recovery. We will occasionally get a newer member, usually still more mature in age.

One of my meetings has 2 regulars who have had open heart surgery, 2 with shoulder replacement surgery, and 2 or 3 with new knees. I can be grateful to not have had any of those. Should I say yet?

There are a few of us who are diabetic. Back and neck problems are an issue from time to time for a few.

Another meeting has a group member with a terminal cancer diagnosis, heart trouble, neck and shoulder aches and pains, and some memory issues. We are all supportive of each other's successes and problem issues. We do what we can to offer support.

Aches and pains are pretty common with aging, and from what I have seen they are mostly mentioned before the group as most are feeling better after the group. The meeting almost never has aches and pains or health problems as a topic but there seems to be a check-in of sorts when arriving.

I am so grateful for all of my support from family, friends, and my support groups.