The Story of My Life That I Didn't Write

To say this book hit home would be an understatement. This book feels like someone took the bones of my life story and went full force down one of the millions of possible paths I could take. Allow me to take you through the beautiful and heartbreaking story of The People We Keep, while also sharing with you the rollercoaster of my own life and how the two entwine.

Let me start by introducing you to April Sawicki, our protagonist and oftentimes anti-hero. April is a 16-year-old singer/songwriter living in a motorhome by herself, struggling with finding her place in the world, making music and making money doing it, keeping a copacetic relationship with her dad, and basically seeking out anyone who understands her. Now, I'm not sure if any of this resonates with you but, from the moment I read the synopsis of this novel, it resonated heavily with me. I was not sixteen but twenty-one upon reading this, but April is nineteen by the end of the book, so close to the same age. But my twenty-first year was one of the absolute hardest of my life thus far -- from my stepfather taking his life to me and my mother moving in with my grandmother, and so much more, I had to mentally reset myself while helping others who depended on me. This book came in like a warm hug in the midst of chaos, a resounding voice telling me I wasn't alone.

Going over first the similarities between April and I:

I, too, lived in a motorless motorhome before the move to my grandmother's house. Well, I lived (and currently live, again) in a free-standing travel trailer, but the idea is there.

Like April, I am also an aspiring singer/songwriter, though her brave soul did much more with her talents at the tender age of sixteen than I have even now.

My relationship with my father is also subpar, even more so now than during the time I read this book, unfortunately.

And, like April, and I'm certain like many of you, I was/am struggling to find my place and my people.

Sweet April gets into many sticky situations, some that she gets herself out of and some she doesn't have as much luck with. While I cannot relate directly to many of the bigger hangups and heartbreaks that occur in the years we see of her life, I still see a kindred spirit in this lost soul.

April moves through the world, finding slivers of home and peace in many places, people, her songs, and even at her job at a coffee shop. She has to learn lessons in such an unconventional circumstance, especially for someone so young. Only having her dad and one of his ex-girlfriends as authority figures (and the ex being the one who better understands her) puts such a mental strain on her in a time when she needs support and peace. She finds solace in places that she admittedly probably shouldn't, putting herself in danger many times.

But I think that's my favorite thing about April -- she isn't perfect, not even close, and neither am I. April falls in love with men who aren't right for her. She leaves home at sixteen out of anger and desperation and spite and sleeps in a freezing car in a closed RV park. She tells lie after lie after lie, from little and white to huge and detrimental, hurting people in the process, but she does it because she knows she has to in order to survive. April loses track of herself and sight of her goals, and she's forced to abandon ship multiple times, leaving behind newly found friendships and places she feels she might finally belong to. And although her story is not exactly mine, it is so true and real and raw.

I hope I can embark on my own April-esque adventure someday; I'm still working my way there, currently. Although, I do hope my journey can go a little more smoothly then April's, but don't we all. Even if some of the troubles she endured plague me, I'll face them all knowing they are all a part of my story.

One section of the dedication of this reads, For you, if any part of this book help you feel a little more understood. And I'm happy to say that it did. If April can have people rooting for her amongst the madness and chaos and imperfections, I can find some peace, too. April and I are deserving of happiness. We're deserving of people to keep.

The People We Keep, my unofficial autobiography, made me sob, smile, get comfortable and happy, then it swept the rug out from under me, as life so often does. I hope you can read it and if not relate then at least find some life lessons or love for April and her people. I love April like a real friend and wish the best for her in whatever she goes on to do in her faraway world. She is real to me.