Psycho Valentine
Day One
I got a phone call from mother, no, let me reframe that, mother left hundreds of voicemails and texts on my mobile phone just to tell me that grandma had died. Ok, that ancient piece of museum quality antique kicked it, so what? Everyone’s gotta die someday, I’ve been waiting for this to happen for quite a few years now but that old piece of shit just won’t drop it. And now, I’m having the time of my life here in university, with all the wild party invites to fulfil and ultra handsome bikes to spot and ride, naturally, I can not be bothered to attend to dead people. But father knows me better than anyone else, he told mother to tell me that he got the new iPhone X waiting for me at home, if I attend the funeral, it is mine. Ah, dilemma, dilemma, to iPhone or to ravish hot chiselled bodies. Ok, you old pieces of shit, you got me. iPhone X here I come.