I am a human, mother, midwife, writer and photographer. I am passionate about family and the individuals within them. I believe in self awareness and the continuous evolution of self and in the value we all have to contribute.
I've always been drawn to yoga, ever since I found out it was a thing, and while my practice has been piecemeal over the years, I feel it is fair to say that my yoga practice has coincided with some very significant and wonderful moments in my life. Over the last 20 years I have tried many different classes, and some have been life changing such as when I was attending classes at Yoga Baby when I was pregnant with my son, but many classes just didn't feel quite right for me. Hot yoga is sweaty and disgusting in my opinion and as someone who is hyper-flexible I was always having to be conscious of not over-stretching and hurting myself, other classes have felt too fast or focused of intense levels of contortion, which while I appreciate this may work for others just didn't help me to soothe my impressive Vata imbalance. Then by happy chance I found myself in Louisa's class. Her classes were the gloriously blissful highlight of my week, no matter how I was feeling her class just seemed to be magically tailored to meet my exact needs, it was like she knew my soul better than I did. Unfortunately, after about a year I was no longer able to attend Louisa's classes, but thankfully she pointed me in the direction of One Family Yoga and Fitness, where I found wonderful classes that also felt like just the magic I needed to soothe my soul and find a little zen in my manic life. It was here that I first experienced Restorative Yoga, if you have never tried it you really must, the feeling of stillness and of being completely held and supported is truly divine.
Finding the real magic
Photography was very possibly the first great love of my life. From the first moment I held an SLR camera in my hands I was completely enamoured, every high school art assignment was manipulated to include photography, friends became subjects, and nothing brought me more joy than the sound of the shutter snapping my carefully considered composition.
Surender Vs The Hustle
I've been told that good things come to those who hustle while they wait, and for a long time I have taken this at face value and tried to live by it. Now at 42 years of age (the number that is the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything according to the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy), I find myself completely burnt out and out of alignment with the things that I truly value, and I have to question if the hustle is all its cracked up to be. I am exhausted, unsatisfied and to be honest dispite a lot of conscious effort very little has ever really worked out as I would have hoped. I've become extremely good at looking for lessons and silver linings and practically have a doctorate in trying to be better, but in all honesty the journey has been long and arduous and finding the joy in it has often been a massive freaking effort.
Do ya love?
As the dreaded Valentine's Day falls upon us and my social media feed is full of reminders that this is the all important day that will define how loved I am and thus my value as a human being, I can't help noticing that Valentine's Day seems evoke all of our fears, insecurities, vulnerabilities and wounds, and all of our defence mechanisms come out to play.
Jemima was 10 years old and could not remember a moment in her life when she had not been hungry. She knew her father worked hard to earn money, but she also knew that not a lot of it made it into her mothers worn leather purse, so there was rarely much food on the table and her two older brothers were quick to grab what there was. When she tried to fight them for her share, her mother stopped her saying that the boys needed it more than they did as they must grow into strong men, girls shouldn't eat too much anyway, no one wants a fat wife. After helping her mother clean the kitchen Jemima would lie in her bed telling her rumbly tummy to be quiet as she imagined the delicious meals she would make when she was a grown up and never have to share.
Birth Plan like a Boss
What you don't expect when you are expecting. Pregnancy is one of those magical times in life when everyone wants to put in their ten cents worth of unsolicited advice. Your mother, mother-in-law, sister, friends, random lady at the coffee shop, your mechanic, dentist and pretty much everyone you happen to cross paths with has some pearl of essential wisdom that they feel compelled to share with you. While it is all well intended, do you really need to know that your sister-in-law tore from here to there and things were never the same down there, so a caesarean is the only way to have a baby? Or that the checkout chick at woolies was in labour for a week and it was the worst experience of her life? Or that if you love your baby you simply have to have a drug free labour according to a woman you met through a Facebook group who had 5 babies all without pain relief? No you could very possibly live a happy and well adjusted life with out this knowledge that you are now privy to in your impregnated state.
My Year of Self Love
I have always loved New Years, even more than Christmas. For me, New Year's Day has always felt like a magical fresh start with a clean slate, a chance to make plans and sort my life out once and for all. It also helps that we have a family tradition of going to the beach every year, which is my happy place. For years I have approached the impending New Year with hope, optimism and insanely lofty goals only to drag myself across the years finish line frustrated and disappointed with myself and ready to do it all over again. Desperate for change, something, anything, please.