OneMooreCrystal
Bio
I will start by saying I am a MESS! I'm embracing this mess because it is MY MESS. My story unfolds one day at a time and it could end today. I'm hoping for a happy ending, let's see if I get it.
Stories (4/0)
Get it out
I'm sitting on my daughter's porch steps...again. But now it’s cold and dark. I miss J. I hate that I couldn't hold my own shit together enough to help him with his shit. He always had arms around me telling me it was gonna be okay. But I see how I have put others’ needs before his, just to secure a place to live. My anxiety and distractedness growing harder and harder to deal with. His attempts at employment triggering paranoid episodes more and more intense. And when he reached his limit and I was already shutting down, we broke. We hurt each other. Badly. We said things that never should have been said.
By OneMooreCrystal3 years ago in Families
Get it out (continued)
Maybe “he” needs me or something. I don't want to be at a shelter. If he needs me I don't want to go through another night of hell in the truck with him. When he is "okay" a night of talking and snuggling in the truck is the best thing ever. When he's not "okay" it is hell. I should just ask his friend what’s up.
By OneMooreCrystal3 years ago in Families
Cha Cha Changes
I have decided that I am a mess. It took me a while to realize this. I have been given a lot of labels throughout my life but I think this one fits pretty well. I have a complicated past and an uncertain future. I realize this could be anybody, but I can only account for MY MESS. Maybe you want to hear about it although most people don’t. It’s pretty cringy. It’s extremely messy. I have recently understood that good and bad are relative terms. You may think I’m good, you may think I’m bad, I think I’m definitely both, but I am the only ME that I can be. Let me introduce myself.
By OneMooreCrystal3 years ago in Psyche
