I’ve just discovered that my father is a narcissist, and I still can’t believe it. My father is in his late 90s, but don’t let that fool you. This is not some doddery old man who doesn’t know what day of the week it is. In fact, my father is kind of a miracle man, inasmuch as he’ll be getting his telegram from the Queen in just a couple of years, but he’s still the fittest person I know. He swims every day of the year, regardless how cold or wet it may be, and many days during winter he’s the only person out there in the icy cold water. After his swim, he gets on his stationary bike and pedals away for 30 minutes, then finishes off with some stretching exercises. He plays golf on a regular basis and can hold his own with golfers 20 and 30 years younger than himself. He doesn’t need to wear glasses, he certainly doesn’t need a hearing aid, and he even has all his own teeth! He lives in his own home, mows his own lawns and tends to his garden himself. Every day he gets into his car and takes himself shopping and out for lunch. And, to top it all off, he is an excellent cook and is perfectly capable of taking care of his home. Yes, I sound proud of him, and in a way, I am.
Bulimia is not proud! It doesn’t care how rich you are, how old you are, or where you live; it doesn’t even care whether you’re married or single, a Uni student, stay-at-home Mum, or in charge of a huge corporation.
I’m so glad that I finally get to tell my #MyWorstDate story.
I’ve titled this article “My Father Hated Me” but in fact it was a lot worse than that: the truth is my father despised me and everything about me. As I write this I hope I’m not sounding too much like a victim, and to this day I still wonder if a lot of this is in my head, but then I remember: I know the truth, because this has been my life ever since I was a little girl. For reasons unknown to me, my father has always had an intense dislike of me, and that includes just the sight of me. I often wonder: What do I remind you of; or what was going on when I was a baby that turned you so against me? But, I don’t know the answer.
Sadly, we know that when parents are angry and lose control, "reasonable force" often escalates into full-blown abuse, and that’s when most infant homicides occur.
I just received a phone call from my father saying that he and his wife have just returned home from their latest excursion – a week’s holiday in the north of our state where it’s a little warmer than the winter they’ve been experiencing in their hometown. What’s rather unique about this story is that both my father and stepmother are 96 years of age! My father drove the 6-plus hours to their destination, and each day they were there they swam early each morning and played nine holes of golf before lunch. Admittedly, my stepmother drove the golf buggy while my Dad played golf, but my point is that this couple have just spent a glorious week’s holiday playing in the sun, without requiring any assistance whatsoever.