Lara Narzinsky
Bio
Married 30+ years, self-employed 30+ years.
Stories (1/0)
Making Your Marriage Last
Will my marriage last? That is a question you may have asked yourself. During the first few years of my marriage I asked myself that very question, not because I wasn’t committed to my marriage, but because there were so many outside influences that had potential to foul things up for us. We got married young. I was 21 and he was 23. We were high school sweethearts, with an off-and-on relationship for about a year. We got back together after high school and after a year he proposed. After a year-long engagement, we got married in the church I had attended when I was younger. Neither of us had gone to church in years, but it was important to us that we get married in a church. The reverend didn’t really remember me. I was surprised that he didn’t require us to have any sort of pre-marital counseling. As a matter of fact, I really do not recall even talking about all the important things that two people planning a life together should talk about. I knew we needed a place to live, so while we were planning the wedding, we simultaneously looked for a house. I had an ideal image in my head of the way things should be. I knew that I didn’t want to start off paying rent, that we needed to buy a little house to start off in. I thought the financial commitment that we were making together was important toward the longevity of our relationship. We went from living with our parents to moving in with each other. Was that the right thing to do? I know most couples these days don’t do it that way. Most prefer to grow individually before getting married. Most prefer to establish themselves in their career before getting married. I don’t think there is a right way or wrong way to do it. I think it has more to do with your mindset before you get married, as well as, of course, during. Divorce never was something I considered, not due to religious beliefs, but because I knew I loved this man that much. I knew that, no matter what, I would always love him. Yes, of course there have been times when I didn’t want to even look at his face and contemplated smothering him with a pillow while he slept. Just kidding, of course. But, you know what I mean. My husband is not the best communicator. He isn’t verbally expressive. I knew he loved me because he said so and because he was looking at houses, planning our wedding, etc. It was more the way we looked at each other. I think we could sort of see ourselves in each other's eyes. Not trying to make this mushy, but it was just a feeling that we had found our someone.
By Lara Narzinsky5 years ago in Humans