Indecisive, laughing happens after coffee, finally clawing my way out of writers block enforced by grief.
The ONE thing I want to change
I want to be a Master of Time. Let me break it down. A few weeks back I wrote about my goals for the new year. It was a hard hitting, tough love, letter to myself to basically get my sh*t together and start to own my time. Because if there is one thing 2020 taught us, it’s that our time and lives are precious and easily taken for granted.
Leaving Busyness Behind
Dear future me, This is going to be harsh, this is going to be blunt but you’re going to thank me for this someday. Enough is enough it’s time to take control.
Lockdown Christmas: How Are You Feeling?
I recently posted a picture on my Instagram of two of my friends and I posing with some shot glasses in my old kitchen in The Netherlands. The photo was taken a few weeks after burying my father and enduring two funerals in two different continents. As I explained in my caption, I was exhausted, most likely still in shock and probably had no idea the way my grief was going to unravel in the months to come.
The Taste of Life
I am about to throw a friend of mine a baby shower. In doing so, I have set up a Whatsapp group with her favourite people and there is no WhatsApp group complete without a cover photo. So, I scrolled through a year’s worth of shots to find a decent one of her, preferably without anyone else in the background. To my surprise, the most recent one I could find was New Year’s Eve 2019. We had all dressed up as characters from a murder mystery and my beautiful friend was in a maid’s outfit, holding a glass of martini in one hand and her skirt in the other – posing like the classy bird she is. Yes, I chose that picture as the cover photo for her baby shower.
The Great Escape
Wednesday 4 November, Entry 454. It's another gloomy day. The humans have emerged from their caves, wherever that may be, and have burst into our confines, stomping. They always seem to push a large white boulder wide open, letting in a glare of light from beyond it. I wonder where that light leads... I wonder if I'll ever get there.
Why You Need A Sad Songs Playlist In Your Life
It is my humble opinion that sad songs make the world go round. There is nothing like blasting your ear drums to the song that touches your inner soul - we all have one. You know, the song you played over and over again when you broke up with your first love, or the song that speaks directly to you at your saddest. There is nothing like that feeling of being completely seen by someone else's words, when you're at your most vulnerable or low.
My grief observed: the imminent milestones
I wrote these words on my blog (here) four years ago; but they still ring true. I was reminded of this piece because a friend of mine is coming close to her own first anniversary milestone. We all get to a point in life when we grieve someone, when we have to face big life occasions without them. If you're there, I hope you find comfort in knowing that you're not alone - our journeys and timelines may be different, but the landmarks can be the same.
One of my favourite things to do is to run my fingers across the lines of your face. To memorise exactly where they begin and end,