Kayla LaFleur- Mosier
I Don't Know You
It always starts out the same, along with the same ending that keeps me doubting if I'm sane. My destination is unknown, yet I'm always on the same bus. A full cab and yet I see her amongst the overpopulated bus. My dear mother who passed so many years ago somehow is among us.
What Exactly Is Happiness?
I often find myself looking back at old pictures of myself, 20-something year old me, and the photos that riddle my many social media accounts. To most, it would appear that girl is, by most accounts, extremely happy. Hell, I even fooled myself a couple of times into thinking, maybe...But, alas, I know the real answer is no. In truth, I even pity that girl, while envying her ignorant bliss at the same time.
My Favorite Company to Transcribe for
So if you're anything like me, being trapped in the house throughout COVID-19 was a huge struggle and an adjustment to make for sure. I definitely learned a lot about myself during the pandemic, thus far, and I'm sure there is much more to come.
Con Artists Constitutional Covid: My Fight For Inmate # 337147
So, the top left picture is how the judicial system views this gentleman. The other two photos are how I view him, clearly very different. If you read the caption on the picture above it is sad, but a true depiction of just how different those opinions on this young man are. Anyone in that jail or in that Courthouse gets a case file and that's all they know about him. One thing I do know for sure if I know nothing else, he is so much more than any crime he has committed. Unfortunately, the legal system has the ability to dehumanize the inmates, and that is surely what my fiancé, (pictured above), has experienced during the last three months. Given that I don't know who to address the very serious issues that are at hand here with, I thought, why not write a story on Vocal, or maybe even a few different platforms and just let people know exactly what's going on. And maybe, just maybe someone will be able to validate the actions of these officers and the judicial system. Or show me an angle to the situation I hadn't been able to see myself.
I have always been, as most would consider, good looking. Some would even go as far as to say, above average. (On a good day that is.) However, like others, I have a guilty pleasure, a vice, if you will. Sometimes, if my days been long, or I find myself with a little to much free time, I start really looking at those "giant pores" on my face, that seem to become exceptionally pronounced once I begin to notice them. So, on a night that is no different from any other work night weekday evening, I pull out my handheld mirror and start looking for any acne blemishes that will fall privy to my trap of misfortune, and of course, "picking." This night in particular, the pores in the area below my eyes, considerably, my inner cheekbones, looked unusually big to me. I didn't necessarily see my usual, whiteheads, blackheads, things of that nature, so I began the ritual, typically saved for my blemishes, on these extraordinarily large pores. I had no other choice. If I did not get out all the gunk that was undoubtedly clogging them, everyone at work would notice first thing when I showed up for work the next day. I was a recepetionist at a Dermatologists office for crying out loud, I had to look my best, this was necessary, I decided. Well, after an hour, and no success at removing ANYTHING from these little, but to me "ginormous" pores, I retired to my bed to watch a little reality T.V. until blissfully falling asleep. I had no idea the horror that awaited me that next day.
I dont wanna...
I don't wanna become another memory, my heart shattered on the floor. "Us" always just one argument away, from all our relationships before. I don't wanna wake up one day , and realize your not there. But if I make you stay and your not happy who's the one not playing fair? I don't wanna lose you, cause I know how bad that'd hurt. Although perhaps again that's me just being selfish, when for once you weren't. I've fought too hard, cried too much, and gave up my whole self. Therefore, I refuse to chalk "us" up, to an unfortunate hand that we were dealt. When you love someone you keep trying, no matter how hard it gets. My love for you is a constant reminder, that your far to perfect, for me to forget. So, I don't wanna become another memory, just some story for you to tell. About a girl that once upon a time said she loved you, and you thought you did as well. You may be able to forget me, just as quickly as you loved me. But I could never stop loving you. And on this you'll have to trust me. I don't wanna be todays argument, just some girl that worked your nerves. Instead, lets just love each other, because regardless of how things are betwen us that is what we have both always preferred. So my love, please promise me my "I don't wanna's" will never become my cold, hard, truth. If we both keep the love between us sincere, we won't have to plan for our next move. So, I'll stop with the "I don't wanna's" or any somber thoughts. And move steadfast towards the future, with you by my side, I see no reason that we'd stop. Going forward I will only think of the "I love you's" and all the reasons why, your the one and only person I 'd ever wanna choose.
Do Angels Sleep?
It was Four in the morning and I really needed to talk. So I asked myself, do Angels sleep? Should I try calling out to my Mom or just lay here and weep? I know that she's the only one that can console me when everything's gone wrong, so what do I do now that I know she's gone? I laid my head on my pillow and rest assured, a cold breeze came over me and I pulled up my cover. "Mom is that you?" I was barely able to whisper. I got no response, but that was just like Mom, she was quite the listener. I told her of my day gone wrong and how I needed her. I could tell she was with me, I didn't need to see her. And with her picture in my head it all felt so real, it's like the beating of her heart was all I could feel. But then she was gone and I asked myself, was she really there or was that my selfishness? Its four in the morning and she should be dead asleep. Then the question came back up and no answer was received. Do Angels Sleep? And if so I'm not surprised she came to her daughters needs. So I'd just like to thank her the Angel of my dreams. I promise you this isn't all as far fetched as it kind of seems. I love you mommy dearest, I promise this is true. Tomorrow we'll talk again, I'd say around Two :)