The Winemaker of Deuxreines
I watch them every morning, the line of men walking past my farm. Each man carries a thin box. Some have small boxes they can carry in the palm of their hands, others need two hands to carry theirs and every now and then a donkey will accompany one of the men whose box is too large to carry himself. The donkey men are my favourite - so proud of themselves! Sometimes the men with the tiny boxes lose their nerve at this stage; they look at their own little box, and then to the donkey man’s box and back to theirs. Surmising that all hope is lost, they dash their box on the ground, relinquish their place in line and skulk off the way they came. I used to go out and collect these discarded little parcels. I’d bring them back to my kitchen table and open them as I pushed a hot jam and buttered croissant into my mouth. I always hoped I’d be surprised but I never was, so I stopped gathering them after a while. Always the same. An oil painting of the fields of Deuxreines. Most had cornflower blue skies, some were indigo and moonlit, others in the snow; pretty enough and they’d certainly look well above a fireplace but they would not do for our queen.
- Third Place in If This, Then That Challenge
5 Stranger Towns to Visit After Hawkins...
I know. I KNOW. It’s been over a year since your last visit to Hawkins, Indiana. You miss Dustin. You’re itching to fly down Maple Street on your tricked-out BMX and what you wouldn’t give for a burger from Benny’s. Hawkins felt like home for three seasons so it’s no surprise that we’re experiencing a sort of homesickness for this strange little town. It all comes down to the milieu.
- First place in (Un)Common Knowledge Challenge
Love & War: The Gay Army who Destroyed the Spartans!🏳️🌈
When Gerard Butler King Leonidas led his 300 warriors into one of the most notorious battles in history, The Battle of Thermopylae in 480 BC, his army became the ultimate symbol of strength, bravery and peak masculinity. This three-day bloody battle spawned countless iterations; paintings, statues, essays, novels, comic books, movies, memes and the fancy dress costume of choice for buff dudes.
The Procrastination Time Machine
Our future selves are assholes. It’s taken me a long time to realise this. I think most people will agree that when we’re asked to imagine our ‘future self’, we usually conjure up a superhuman being. It’s us, but better. I’d fall into this trap every New Year’s Eve, when a very strange phenomenon occurs, rendering me unconscious to my personal shortcomings. I’d write out my resolutions and goals for the year ahead with great aplomb. Sure, I might have spent the majority of the past 12 months on the couch, half-assing life...but future me? She’s got this! She’ll glide through life effortlessly, waking up at 5am to meditate and journal before busting out a 5k hike, green juice in hand. She’s never late, always remembers birthdays and somehow, between her many important meetings and working lunches, she manages to look like she’s stepped out of a magazine. She’s healthier, wealthier, happier, calmer...shinier somehow.
5 ideas to make your insta story pics more interesting!
A few years ago, an article about photo editing would have been filled with advice on aspect ratio, compression and bokeh (no, me neither). Whilst the world still needs skilled photographers who know their apertures from their shutter speeds, many of us without a knowledge of the craft can lay claim to having a photograph hanging in a gallery with over one billion visitors every month.
How I Aquarius’d the Sh*t out of my Birthday
Every year on my birthday I pick a theme and plan the whole day around it. Last year I went “Around the World” with a Malaysian cafe for lunch, an Italian cake shop for dessert and rounded the day off with a trip to the (fictional) country of Zubrowka with my favourite movie ‘The Grand Budapest Hotel’.
The Art of Keeping a Diary
LOCAL GIRL FINDS BURIED ‘TREASURE’ Sydney Green, 12, unearthed an intriguing discovery whilst playing with her metal detector at Pegwell Bay. The detector was alerted by an old, metal paint tin which contained a small, black notebook. The book appears to have been a diary of sorts, with sketches, ephemera and inscriptions. Although charming, experts don’t believe it holds any significant monetary worth.
“Alexa. Play a love song.” “When a maaaaan, loves a womaaaaan....can’t keep his m...” “Alexa. Stop.” It’s 3am on February 13th and I’m scouring the internet for a Valentine’s card to give to my girlfriend of seventeen years. If you’ve never been a gay woman on the hunt for a romantic greetings card to give to another gay woman before, let me talk you through your options: There are vaginas. Everywhere. Some artfully drawn, others...not. Boobs, lots of boobs. The creative use of the word (?) ‘Lez’ is something to behold! Shout out to my personal favourite: “Lez Be An Couple”.