Faith Taylor
Stories (1/0)
Finding Me
There was always an aching emptiness in my heart as a child, a constant draining feeling that I was missing something. Maybe it was the relationship with a father that every child yearns for. My dad was always there until he wasn’t, until his priorities were not his own child, but his own selfish acts. It wasn’t my fault, it never was, it wasn’t my mother’s either it was nothing but his own. My mother who raised me alone with 3 other kids, would often reach out in search of financial support, I remember hearing his spiel of excuses and always justifying them. So, it left my mother to raise me alone. (as a child) I started to think I was unimportant and was of no value in my father’s life. My mother would often reassure me that he didn’t think of me as a burden and he did truly care for me and loved me, and that he was trying, but was he? It pained me to see her lie so I didn’t grow to resent him, I always saw right through the pain in her eyes, and I heard what she refused to say. Whenever he did provide support, it was very little. It was even more difficult for my mother to get by due to her depression, so I watched her suffer even more because of this. Nine years after he went back to his native country, I had finally managed to afford a trip to see him. I thought that maybe this trip would rekindle the bond that we once had when I was a child and maybe I wouldn’t have to constantly feel bad about him never being around. This trip was what I needed. I needed a father. At least that’s what I told myself.
By Faith Taylor3 years ago in Families