African native and Western Adoptee.
Words without meaning.
The inability to feel deeply degrades a person. I write this to share what is and will continue to be the essentials. I stand and with a spine, promise not to use words that are thieves. Nor will I structure or manipulate a group of words to burry truth. At the end, I pray that like me, you too will be able to swallow the sun with a smile. I present this in a manner I’ve judged to be productive. Although the draft and its revisions could’ve been of quality, they lacked conviction and confidence. What you are reading is not what you could have read, and that is for your sake. I call attention to living and its current state. The state of the lives we live, and the state of our lives in the shadows when the sun is law. At this moment, the best can be better and what’s good is “enough”. I hope what is evidently absurd be absurd, so it can be named and avoided for the sake of creation and its process. To believe a celebratory observance or a halfhearted praise of the great pillars of civilization, is a suitable substitute for constant protection and maintenance is criminal. That is a dangerous belief to have because it breeds a hate even love itself shames. So, what is the root of it all? … is the root of it all. An ambiguous and universal will without a probate that draws a will to question itself. A question without an answer can be borne, so long as it is not infuriatingly redundant. After all, what the loaned ear asks to be compensated with is ordered chaos. Why have a tongue or knowledge of language, and abuse a privilege such as communication? My love for words cannot be worded and when words dance well, I attribute to their dance a word we believe an exuberate rainforest embodies. Moreover, there are certain things we cannot know why we don’t know. One of them is life after living. If what lies beyond can only be found beyond physical existence, why pose the question? Perhaps asking why there is a will and why most people pretend there isn’t one, is a way to be useful. The adventure offered to the person that tries to answer why there is a being that wills, is far more an enlightening experience and will momentarily satisfy father time. Unfortunately, it will not stop him or his wondering eyes. The ones who accept the adventure are blessed with a savory gift. A present terribly wrapped in time. Those who feel otherwise prepare for an imaginary after. Quite honestly, is it not favorable to make the incorrect educated guess and be left better educated? What is a "Belief," if it is not that exaggerated, but without an instantiation? To be graced with the present and its informative moments is life preserving, and only a life preserved can pose questions to expand life. Failing at or after an attempt, is suddenly desirable when confronted with the consequences of failing to be selfish. Failing to understand being selfless towards oneself is the prerequisite for generosity. The selfish person that is selfless in a truth preserving way is loved fearingly. However, we have made the existence of such a person expendable. The expendables were once a group of selfless essentials. Today, they are betrayed and gifted roses with poisonous thorns. Passion is a dense reason to be unaware and staying that way. Nonetheless, it empowers the orchestra of thoughts and unfortunately, we believe the tree of ideas can only be scenic because of its branches and leaves.
Black to Back
It’s Tuesday night and he finds himself checking his emails while driving. Yes, he is entirely aware of the dire consequences of doing that, but he persists. He stops at a red light and comes across an email that claims to help him come into possession of $20,000 in 6 months. At first glance, he thinks “just another company trying to scam hardworking people out of their life experiences”. Then he thinks for a moment and says “well if someone spent the time writing this email and I spent my time reading it, I am halfway to that $20,000.” So, he decides to take the leap and follow the instructions given in the email. The instructions in the email are as follows; 1. Get a small black book, one that can fit in your back pocket. 2. Every day at 7 in the morning you will write the exact day you want the money why you received it. 3. Every night at 7 pm you will read every single sentence you’ve written from the day you started till the present. These are simple rules to follow and he did just that.
“The depths of the female heart have yet to be explored to this day” Fyodor Dostoyevsky. I don’t know exactly what he meant by that. It is a quote I can remember word for word. If we know anything about memory and especially with words, is the amount of attention that must be paid to remember something WORD for WORD. I guess that should serve as a reason for how important this quote is. Would it not make sense that a factor in the judgment of competence about a topic, should be how much a person values what they’re preaching their competence of? If that makes sense then I will explore Dostoyevsky’s quote and why he wrote it. In the end, I will explore such depths further than anyone has, at least further than the day this quote was written.
AMARE vs. ODIO
I watched from afar and I mean there were so many people I could not get as close as I wanted to. People had been talking about it for years and today was the day it was going to happen. The battle of the decade, the final war. Confused bystanders or should I say people who had been living under a rock kept asking the same question over and over. "Who is fighting? Why are they fighting? " One person would get their answer and a few moments later some dumb ass would be asking the same question. Anyway, the stage was set, people were settling in and things began to quiet down as the two fighters began to slowly walk towards each other. It was a battle between Amare and Odio. The two most powerful fighters in the world and no one else came close. Don’t even try and debate me on this because the magnitude of these two fighting could clearly explain how powerful they were compared to anyone else.
Dalila the Dandelion
Two matches when lit on fire then placed next to each other and if close enough, will burn eternally together. They were grown in a small town in the eastern part of the world. It is funny people named it a dandelion because when the sun kissed it the glow that it exuded resembles what can only be the reflection of a specific version of the sun. If you happen to come across one that hasn’t fully bloomed, you would be tempted to pluck one up, severing the corpse of such a gift into two and blowing away the connections it took a lifetime to grow. You do this in hopes of being granted a wish which we both know is pathetic. Such a gift should only be left to grow and to bloom into something that can stand in the suns’ way and reflect to the human eye the closest thing it would ever come to staring directly into the sun. Although most of the time people do this to dandelions, the only explanation I have is that from the premature death of what would become beautiful is the mere theft of the power that it takes to create something in life.
WHAT DOES LOVE HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?
Do you know how selfish and dark humans can be? Honestly, do you have any idea? No? Great let me introduce you to the dark side of humans. Two people could be sitting at a table at lunch table together and one of them would say to the other, "hey did you order a piece of toast because I ordered 2 so if you don't mind giving me half yours that will be great." Imagine that! You already have one but since you ordered two and only received one, you want to take half of someone else's because it wasn't what you ordered? If I loved you as a human, just as much as I love myself deeply. I will understand the reason why they packed their lunch to have for dinner and you are eating yours now. The circumstances we are both in doesn’t have to be worse. Be grateful and appreciate that we both have something to eat at the end of the day. Love has nothing to do with that side of human beings.
It’s a Race. Why is it called a race when no one else seems to be running? What does the term racist mean? Here is what the internet will tell you, they are people who hate or discriminate against others of a different skin color. Here is what society will tell you, it’s the damn K.K.K and the Nazi Group, and each member of that group is ignorant and for probably the average civilian.
Just a friend
Why am I here? What do I want? Challenges, walls, motivators, whatever one decides to call it is the reason why a person is who they are or who they aspire to be. This is different for everyone. I in the next four or five years would imagine myself doing several things. One cannot live without work, goals and ways to achieve those goals, now I understand fully that in the era that we are in, financial security is the new black so to speak. Although being financially secure and stable is what I want, it is not the reason why I chose the path of helping others. Who knows I might change my mind either in the next year or ten years.
Act for both
Desire Slowly I started, hands through the thick brown threadlike strands growing from her scalp. The high temperature of the invisible gaseous substance, that she exhaled from her nostrils, filled my left ear. As our lips drew closer together and our faces aligned, she squirmed like a slug being salted to death. Right before our lips could meet, I pulled away.