Courts of Course
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MY PTSD DIAGNOSIS
My name is Courtney. I am 33 years old and have struggled to cope with my mental health since first diagnosed with major depressive disorder at age 19. If i look back at those years since that diagnosis, I see a tangled mess of emotional roller coasters, confusion, tears, anger and a mountain of stress piled on top of Mum and Dad for having to 'deal' with my chaotic life and poor decisions I have continued to make up until this day. I have an endless list of counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists and doctors who I have worked with, the majority I have not liked or bonded with other than 2 out of almost 20 names on that list. Rarely anything that was taught to me made any such difference to my mental well-being, and if there was anything gained it was merely a band-aid solution, holding me together until an unexpected life hurdle is thrown my way, then all of the teachings are forgotten, I get trapped in my emotions and remembering the practices of mindfulness are no use to me when my state of mind is triggered into an unsafe state, and in the few times mindfulness has come to mind, I can't remember a thing about it no matter how hard i try.
By Courts of Course4 years ago in Psyche