I’ll never forget sitting in the car with you the summer of 2020, the summer of the Pandemic, the summer the car we were sharing had no A.C., and we had to make our weekly grocery store haul. I was low on money. I was embarrassed. I worked up the courage to tell you that I couldn’t help pay for groceries this week, and you smiled and casually said, “I was already planning on covering it, anyway.” This is just a small example of how loved and accepted you make me feel, always.
“Why am I all by myself at 9:30pm on a Saturday night in New York City?!” I thought to myself, as I wandered slowly down the sidewalk. The movie was great, (more than great, romantic-comedies are my FAVORITE and this one was particularly romantic AND comedic) but too short, and if I went back to my apartment now, my middle-aged roommates would think I had no social life. How is it that Jo, the 65-year-old musical theatre actress, had more of a social life than me? I’m 27. I’m in the prime of life. I live in New York City! Most nights, I’m in bed watching Netflix by 10:30pm. Being that it was Saturday, I had decided to go out to the movies. (I know, I know, WILD night). Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE seeing movies by myself. But after awhile, you start to wonder if you’re weird. Being alone so much. Not having more friends. More plans. Maybe I just push people away? Maybe I’ve turned down too many social opportunities in the past and people have given up inviting me. Maybe I’m afraid of people getting too close.