The Online Dating Survival Guide
I turned to online dating for an odd mix of reasons. I wasn't meeting people in college who I really gelled with and I didn't want to try pursuing a relationship with a colleague. After years of hoping for a serendipitous meeting with my perfect someone, I decided it was time to get a little more aggressive with my search for a partner.
Dear Secretary Who Doesn't Know What a Mail Delivery Failure Is
Dear secretary who doesn't know what a mail delivery failure notification is, First of all, thank you for manning this desk and accepting packages for people because the mail men aren't smart enough to find office numbers. I know that it isn't a fun job. I've done similar jobs in the past. I've done a lot of paper-pushing and my fair share of mail processing in past jobs.
My Rocky, Reluctant Marriage to Makeup
You grow up hearing the words. "You don't need to wear makeup to be pretty." "It's what's inside that counts." "It doesn't matter if you look different from other girls."
The Things I Must Do
I must push you, force you, make you. — You won’t move, speak, walk along the line without me attempting to guide you
The Most Delightful Conversation
Ah, I’m enthralled! For the dozenth time in just set of our planet’s rotation yet again I see I’m communicating with drywall
A Letter to You
Dear someone I regularly say "I love you" to, There are things I want to tell you, but it seems that I can't anymore. I remember the first time I really and truly cried in front of you. It wasn’t exactly something I was proud or eager to do. We’d been together for about six months before I let myself break in front of you. That was over three years ago now. I was upset, panicking in the wake after being in a hit and run car accident, and started to sob.