I put on twenty layers of mascara and red lipstick before I walk out the door. You can't cry in red lipstick, and who wants layers of thick black tears running down their faces? I cry when I'm angry, I cry when I'm sad, and I cry when I'm happy. If I experience an intense emotion, it usually ends in tears. I drown in my feelings. I don't swim in them. Today I woke up gasping for air. I hope I don't go under again.