I’m the best mom in the world

My mom is the worst mom in the world. Both my parents are narcissists. My mom might be a psychopath too. When I was 3 years old, she hit me while I was still asleep for wetting the bed.

When I was 5, she told me, “Had I not had you, I would have left your dad long ago”. Nobody talks to their child this way. She always felt that I was a burden to you.

She kept me alive because she thought she benefitted from showing off my good grades to others and trying to make them jealous. She was very greedy and very jealous of others. She didn’t even like her own nieces. She used to be jealous of them too. When I was in my 4th grade, she was shouting at me for being dark skinned as compared to my older cousin.

She was obsessed with my academic performance. She used to punish me even when one child got better grades than me. She was a sociopath. She never trusted me. I had Stockholm syndrome with her because of my trauma. She was still my mom. I lived under the same roof as her. I used to come and share my happiness, sorrows, knowledge, etc. with her. Her worst fears came true when my grades started dropping since my 11th grade. She used to ask me the same question a fifty times. Regardless of the answers I said (“Like I am not having enough time to finish my syllabus”, “I am not intelligent enough”), she used to still ask me the same question again and again. From that day onwards, every single time I talked to her, she used to find it as an invitation to disrespect me. She made sure that I had no peace of mind any single day. She watched me like a hawk and even if I took a 5 minute break, she used to yell at me. She constantly looked for reasons to yell at me. Nobody would have been able to survive such a trauma. I lived day to day.

Nobody (including my dad) understood my trauma. My dad was very selfish. He couldn’t put up with her torture and divorced her. However, when I complained to my dad about mom with teary eyes, he didn’t empathise with me. He didn’t want to spent time with me at all. He was a workaholic and a perfectionist. He is also the worst father in the world. However, he didn’t hate me like my mom did. She didn’t even hesitate to call me “ugly”. My did never called me “ugly”. My mom is worse than my dad.

My grandmother was the worse grandmother in the world. She was also a narcissist. She was the one to blame for my mom’s narcissism. She used to look for reasons to fault me to make herself feel better. She used to punish me for silly things. She was worried about my bike than me when I fell down and was bleeding from my knee. She hated me because she hated my dad for divorcing my mom. She used to complain about me to him and make me feel terrible. One day she said “That son of a bitch left you with me”. She too felt that I was a burden to her. She too constantly looked for reasons to yell at me. For example: She yelled at me even when I got a 99% in math. She screamed that my neighbour got a 100%. She herself admitted to me many times that she got a 19% in math in her 10th grade. She had no empathy for me. However, she was not a psychopath. She never punished me for using the bathroom. My mom used to yell at me even when I took a bathroom break while I was studying. My mom is worse than my grandmother.

My grandfather is also a narcissist. He was treated like a servant by his own adoptive mother that he started being scared of female figures early in his life. He was afraid of my grandmother. My grandmother used to freely yell at him and he used to keep quiet. He was also afraid of his daughter too. When my grandmother and my mom were torturing me, he never spoke a word. It was easier for him to agree with them brainlessly like a sheep than to fight with them for me. He was a coward. He choose his peace of mind over wisdom. I am sure that in this next life, he will be punished for being a narcissist.

My aunt is a narcissist too. She too hated me. Instead of seeing me like a human being, she constantly compared me with her daughter and yelled at me unnecessarily. She never listed to me nor respected me. She constantly looked for reasons to hate me. However, she was better than her mother. She was also a good mom to her daughter. She used to look for reasons to appreciate her daughter. She used to tell her daughter, “you are a good girl”. She played good role in making her daughter self confident. She also taught me how to be a good mom. I also look for reasons to appreciate my daughter. Unlike my mom, I trust her. I feel sad when she cries. My mom used to get irritated even when I cried and hit me for crying. She was a monster mom. I feel that I am the opposite of my mom. Doesn’t this make me the best mom in the world?